


Ho voglia di te (I want you)

by orphan_account



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-09
Updated: 2015-04-21
Packaged: 2018-02-08 02:02:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 12
Words: 27,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1922514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on the spanish movie "Tengo Ganas de ti" (I want you) Ashlyn came back to her hometown after spending 4 years in Germany, she left in the first place because she wanted to run from her past, now that she's back she found out that nothing is like before, old friends, new friends, an old love and a new one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This story is based on the Spanish movie “Tengo ganas de ti” also based in the book by Federico Moccia “Ho voglia di te (I want you)” and it is (also haha) a sequel of the book/movie “A tres metros sobre el cielo” (Three steps/meters above heaven).  
> This first chapter is a (completely reduced) summary of the first part in order to get the complete story and etcetera so it’s kind of a prologue. Or the back story, call it whatever you want.  
> I selected randomly who will be who in this chapter representing whom from the original story.  
> Federico Moccia’s creativity is not mine so all credit to him for the plot. 
> 
> I also warn you, if you have seen the movies/read the books you will notice I changed like a bajillion things, "creative license" but the essence is the same.  
> ENJOY

I still remember how we met; I was stuck in the traffic with my motorcycle when I saw her, she was beautiful, brown hair, green olive eyes, killer smile; so I did the next logic thing that came into my mind. “Hey Ugly!” I shouted when she was about to get her head into the car again. She looked at me and I suppose she thought I wasn’t talking to her. “Yes you! Ugly!” I was sure she was just another rich girl, somebody who will never get the real world. Her name is Christen Press.

_“Nobody knows her name they say something really bad happen to her so she decided to change it, everybody calls her A, and some people say it’s from amazing, other ones say it’s awesome, but we really don’t know. She is like a local hero on a motorcycle” Christen little sister was animatedly talking about the person who just called her sister ugly in the traffic jam._

_“Whatever, she looks like trouble”_

And hell I was trouble, my brother Chris always had problems with me and my attitude. Actually, the second time I saw her was after one of many illegal races I’ve made, my best friend invited me and the gang to a party in the uptown part of the city. A fancy house with a pool and the complete deal, there she was, beautiful as always, having some troubles trying to get out of an uncomfortable situation with a guy. I had to save her so I did the logic thing to do: I jumped with her inside of the pool. That night she almost kissed me, it was the first time in my life I fall in love.

_“So, what’s your real name A?” Christen asked, looking right in the blonde’s eyes._

_“Ashlyn Harris, but don’t make me repeat that again.”_

I started searching for her at her school; all of her friends always asked me things about me they’ve heard around in town. I always knew people used to hear bad things about me, but they didn’t know me. Three facts that were actually true were: first, something did happen to me, but I was the one who did something really bad about it; second, I used to be a top student, straight A’s but I dropped school and started hanging with the guys now I call my friends, and last but not least, yes I used to sleep around with all the girls I knew.

Not that much has passed when her best friend and my best friend started a relationship; apparently Kelly and Hope really liked each other even if the moment they met was when Hope tried to steal Kelly’s money from the pockets of her jacket. I’m not going to say I’ve never liked the relationship, because it was the complete opposite, I loved it. I always thought they were perfect together and I could bet Christen supported me in my opinion.

As always we had a race, Hope wasn’t ridding this one but I was, and this one was special; we have to drive with another person tied, back to back with us. The fun in this race is the fact that the position not only makes you uncomfortable but also really difficult to keep the control with the bike. I was the best. That day I was driving with a girl I used to sleep with,  I don’t even remember her name or maybe I’ve never asked her, she also had a boyfriend I really didn’t care about.

That night we kissed, the police was persecuting everybody and I took Christen to run away with me. We ended up in a high way, and just when the police was about to catch us I throw her into a lake that was near there. When I returned back to get her home, she was really pissed but I tried to mend things giving her my jacket, she thanked me with a kiss.

_“I can’t believe I’m A’s sister in law!” Christen sister was really excited about the news she just heard, she immediately called her friends and told them her sister was dating the coolest motorcycle girl around town. Christen just smiled, she was in love._

I stopped hanging out with my friends; I just only talked to Hope. A few weeks after we started dating I went to the beach with Christen, she looked so beautiful I just wanted to tell her I loved her. That day in an abandoned house we made love, I was her first… but she asked me to be her last. I wanted to keep that promise, I was feeling three steps above heaven and nobody could bring me down.

_“I am happy” Christen told Ashlyn when they were lying on the sand, later that afternoon._

_“I am happy too, Christen”_

_“How much?”_

_“Three steps above heaven”_

Not much passed when we had our first fight, she was pissed by my attitude but I can’t help it, she didn’t need to know my past and I already changed for her, I didn’t know why I wasn’t good enough but I still loved her, so the only reasonable thing to do was to declare her my unconditional love:  I wrote a graffiti on a bridge that I hope It stills reads “You and Me 3SAH”. Yes, I was a lovesick girl.

And there we were, living the love we choose, the most perfect feeling a person can experience, something you wish you will forever feel, because you’re three steps above heaven and nothing will bring you down. You are the master of the world. Before her I’ve never thought I will find a person that from nothing became everything, I adored her and I also respected her. She made me a better person because I wanted to be a better person for her.

But we couldn’t be in the honeymoon stage forever, Hope invited the gang to a party she dropped at her house, they stole her mother’s ring, If I wanted to get it back I have to win a race, the problem was, I didn’t wanted to run that race I couldn’t if I wanted. But she was really pissed; she didn’t even answer my calls. I was focusing on her and just her I didn’t care about that stupid race about a stupid ring but I should have.

The race was the same day she was going to celebrate her birthday, so I asked my best buddy to run the race, stupid me, stupid ring thief. I prefer going to her birthday and win her back, I just let Hope run the race for me, I am not an oracle, I couldn’t have predicted the accident that killed her in that race, I hated myself and of course I hated her, Kelley hated her.

We fight, I said things I didn’t mean, and she also said something too, but I don’t care anymore, she broke up with me. What was broken we couldn’t fix it; we were flying so high that the fall was abrupt and hard. She stopped talking to Kelley and me. Her sister tried a couple of times to make things be as they used to be, but we couldn’t. My best friend’s dead was hard and really painful to me. It brought back my past, when I punched a guy out of pure rage and beat him almost to dead I ended up in jail when I was freed Hope helped me to control my anger.  She helped me dealing with my past, and also my worst mistake. Christen didn’t get that.

She said goodbye like nothing had ever happen and that’s when I realized. There is always a time when people’s ways got separated, and you kept thinking “I will find her again” but the truth is, that almost never happens. When you continue your life you start looking back at your memories and see the other person get tiny, so tiny you barely see her. But you keep telling yourself “nothing is wrong, we will find each other at the end”.

Suddenly you realize it’s over. There is no turning back, you feel it, and just then you try to remember when it all started and you discover it all started earlier than you thought. Long before  and that's just at that moment when you realize that things just happen once, no matter how hard you try, and you'll never feel the same, you'll never have the feeling of being three steps above heaven ever again.

“And, what happen to Christen?”  The old lady next to Ashlyn on the plane looked at her; she was raising an eyebrow and kept looking at the blonde as she stopped telling the story to just get lost on her thoughts.

“She started dating some guy from her school and I went to Germany and worked there for four years, now I’m back in the country, awesome right?” The blonde said before she looked back at the lady.

“But where is the point of telling a story without a happy ending?” Ashlyn heard the question and started laughing.

“There is no such thing as happy endings.”

“I will wait for you to tell me the end of this story, it just can’t end like this” the lady kept telling Ashlyn, she just laughed again.

“Really, that’s the end.”

“She was your first love, right? Dear let me tell you something, after the first love, there will come another one, stronger, deeper, truthful, and real; she will love you with all your faults, she will make you dream, she will make you love life and most important she will make you love her.” Ashlyn just looked at the woman, she just moved her head ‘no’ and snorted just before she started laughing again. “Well, if you ever saw me again just tell me the end of this story. And girl, I demand a happy ending.” The lady finished her speech with that and Ashlyn just closed her eyes and tried to sleep the rest of the flight. ‘This lady is crazy’. 


	2. Back home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is another chapter, the original one is narrated in third person but for sake of the story is better to have it in Ashlyn's POV, but I am completely sorry for the mistakes, I had to write the chapter all over again but in first person and I kind of got tired haha.

I finally went out of the plane, I left here four years ago but right now I am feeling like I only left a couple of days ago. The lady I told my history just waved to me, I almost regret the fact that I just told her everything about my previous life, but to be honest I was pretty sure I was not going to see her again. A sea of people was walking all over the place, looking around or going straight to the point, I felt a little lost for a second, I don’t want to go out. Germany was safe, Germany was comfortable.

Germany was a comfort zone, Christen didn’t live in Germany, and I couldn’t jump into her anytime of the day when I was walking down the street, there were a lot of strangers who didn’t care about my past or my present. I kept walking until I reached the exit of the airport, right across the street my brother was smiling at me with his arms open, I felt a little excited but didn’t let it show as I walked towards him and hugged him.

“Oh come on! Look at you Ash!” Chris said to me as he pushed away and looked at me up and down a couple of times. “You actually look thin, but also fit.” He smiled and then helped me with my baggage.  

“Hello, loser!” I said as we walked towards the parking lot, he really looked changed, he is wearing a suit with a tie, shiny black shoes and he even walks with an elegance I didn’t knew he had it in him.  

“Not any more, got a better job.” He said as he looked at me with a big smile. “I even got a new car.”  When he finished his sentence he pointed at a grey convertible Chevrolet Camaro, I opened my mouth in astonishment.

“Can I?” I asked the moment he took out his keys, his face dropped but I know he can’t deny anything to his little sister, I know that, that’s the reason I was so confident he will let me drive his car all the way back home. He threw me the keys and I felt like a little child with a new toy.

“I hope you drive safely now.”

“I changed, four years and Germany changed me” I stated with a smile and started the car, when I was out in the street I went as fast as I could, my brother hold tight to the seat with a scared look in his face, it was funny to see him getting worried about something like this, he is really changed.

“I see you changed for the worst, always problems with you.” He said and I slowed down the car, just to make him feel safe and I also wanted to make the way back home a little longer.

“How is dad?”

“He is cool, he is dating a new woman and he seems happy, they live together now, she is nice so there is no big deal.” I heard him say and I just got lost in my thoughts the moment we passed the bridge, the one I wrote the graffiti, It was now almost gone, but if you try really hard you could probably still see the “You and I 3SAH” or maybe it was just me overthinking the whole thing. “You know mom asked for you a couple of times during the years.” He said and I froze.

“And what did you tell her?”

“Nothing important, just that you were sleeping with all the gay women in Germany.” He laughs as he looks back at me, I know he is joking but I also know what he is going to say next and I really don’t want to hear it. “What happen, that day? I mean you beat that dude and he present charges against you and mom just confirmed his version, but what really happen?” He asked and I froze again, I don’t want to talk about it not with him, not with anybody.

“What they said.” I answered and kept driving; my brother just looked at me with a questioning look in his face and then looked at the highway in front of us.

“Well I don’t think you deserved going to jail.” I smile at him and started driving faster, I didn’t push the conversation anymore, I didn’t want to talk about that, it’s been five years and I was tired of the same old story. When we finally arrived to the building my brother and I were living four years ago, the first thing I did was jump out of the car and run to my old parking spot. “Oh I got the paint a little touched up, it was getting rusty.”

When I lift the protector off I was speechless, my motorcycle, my Honda VF750 Custom was as beautiful as the first day Hope gave it to me, the blue paint was shining like if the complete piece was new, my brother changed the seats and I was grateful for that, my treasure, and apart from my dad and Chris, I was sure the vehicle in front of me was one of the things I missed the most when I was away in Germany. “Thank you Chris, it looks beautiful.”

“What are you going to do now?” He asked when I climbed into my motorcycle and turns it on.

“I am going to see Kelley, then I will be back and put my things back in their place, tomorrow I will start working with you in your super important job.” I answered smiling and started driving out of the parking lot, I was quickly heading to the place me and Kelley agreed to meet, a park near downtown. When I arrived I sat in a bench and waited until I felt someone’s hands in my eyes.

“Are you the girl who confessed her love with a graffiti on a bridge?” Kelley said with a little giggle, I just stood up and hugged her the moment I faced her, she looked just like four years ago, Is she happy? Did she found somebody else after Hope? She looked happy; she looked like she moved on. “You look great!” She continued and hugged me again; she gave me a quick peck on the cheek and then pushed away.

We talked about the four years we have been apart, she was now graduated from university and was working in some enterprise I really didn’t care about, she was making good money and also kept in contact with me and Hope’s friends, she told me she dated a girl but it didn’t worked. I told her about my financial studies in Germany, my job and a couple of dates and one night stands I had there, I wasn’t ashamed, Kelley was the closest thing I had for a friend now.

“What about Christen?” I asked shyly, I knew things also didn’t end well with her and Kelley but they were best friends so I assumed they could have solved their differences. But I knew I was wrong right the second Kelley’s face dropped.

“We don’t talk anymore, we say polite hellos if we cross at each other on the street or at the supermarket but she is so different now, nothing like we used to know.” She said with a sad smile and I could see the tears she was holding in her eyes, I also felt my own trying to get out. I just hugged her again and we lost in the embrace for an eternity. “I have to go now A, but promise we will see each other at least once a week.” She said with a smile and I just nodded my head yes. She left and I drove to the nearest gas station.

I was paying the gasoline when a blue old Chevy parked in the gas pump next to where my motorcycle was, somebody wearing a beanie and a black hoodie walked out of the car, the old man in the register just looked at me and gave me my change before he started talking. “You are the owner of the motorcycle right?” He asked and I felt confused, as far as I know I was the only one in the gas station before the blue car arrived. “I think they are trying to steal it.” He said indifferently, I looked out and the person in the beanie and hoodie was looking at my motorcycle, I ran as fast as I’ve ever ran in my life.

“Hey you!” I screamed at the top of my lungs, and the person jumped far from my motorcycle, making it fall in the ground, I was beyond pissed so I searched for trouble, I took the person’s arm and turned her around. When we faced each other the beanie in her head dropped letting a long brown hair fall over her shoulders, she is a girl, like standard beautiful, in my opinion. “What the hell is wrong with you trying to steal my motorcycle!”  I almost screamed when we faced each other, I admit I was wrong she is not standard beautiful, she is more than beautiful.

“I wasn’t stealing it, I just wanted to take a closer look, I’ve never ride a motorcycle and I always liked this Honda.” She said as she freed her arm from my grip and took her beanie from the floor, she looked at me with an annoyed look and rolled her eyes when she took a better look at me then she take out her car keys. I don’t know why I did the thing I did next: I took her keys out of her hands and ran inside her car. She ran behind me and started punching the window. “What the hell is wrong with you!?” She screamed thru the passenger seat window, I just started the car and she punched the glass harder.

“Hey you have no right to be mad; you tried to steal my baby first!” I screamed back and then opened the passenger seat for her; she entered and punched me hard in the arm. “Whoa who will say your parents gave birth to such a princess!” I said sarcastically as she looked at me really annoyed, she was extremely pissed.

“I hate girls like you.” She said in a whisper.

“Irresistible?” I asked with a cocky smirk, she rolled her eyes again and took a deep breath; once again I was wrong: she is extremely beautiful when she is mad.

“No, jerks.” She said in a bitter tone.

“Now you are being mean.”

“Oh! Look who says it, the girl who is driving my car without my permission. In a few words a car thief.” She said and looked at me with a death glare, I felt chills running down my spine but I decided to ignore them; this girl has something that makes me feel… different.

“You tried to steal my motorcycle first.” I said almost screaming in a playful tone, she looked at me and rolled her eyes again. “But look at the bright side; you had the pleasure to meet me, princess” I winked at her and she looked anywhere but me.

“Yeah, sure I don’t even know your name.”

“Oh sure! Let me introduce myself, my friends calls me A.” I said with a smile, she looked at me and gave a small smile, once again I was wrong: she is out of this world beautiful when she does that.

“That’s a short version of something else or just A for asshole?” she attacks me and I started fake laughing, this girls thinks she is so funny and it just makes her look adorable at my sight.

“Ashlyn Harris and what’s your name princess?”

“Ali for my friends, Alexandra Krieger, and for you is always going to be Alexandra.” She said but I started laughing the moment she finished saying her last name; really? This princess has ‘warrior’ as her last name? Now calling her princess is just funnier than before. “What is so funny asshole?” she is angry but I don’t care, she is out of this universe beautiful every time she looks at me with that death glare.

“You are a princess but your last name is warrior.” I confessed and she just tried to hold a smile, I got her, and she looks beyond words beautiful when she holds a smile like that.  

“At least I don’t go all badass stealing cars and riding a motorcycle with a cutie girly name like Ashlyn.” She said as she raised an eyebrow, I pretended to feel offended but she just made me laugh harder, who the hell is this girl? “And now I know the car thief knows German.” She said and crossed her arms in front of her chest. “When are you going out of my car?”

“I lived in Germany for four years.” I said trying to answer the implied question she made before, and also refusing to answer the real question.

“Awesome, I lived in Germany for 10 years; now get out of my car.” She was getting more annoyed as every second passed and I feared maybe she is not a possible one night hook up I think she would be, well I know when I lose, but for some reason I was not ready to give up in that fight.

“Okay, now we know things about each other, now, let me follow you home, what if you go all road rage with people and kill some pedestrians!” She just gave me a small hit in my arm and moved to the driver’s seat the moment I went out of her car, I ran to my motorcycle and started it as fast as I could so I could follow the brunette all her way home.

She tried to lost me in the streets all the way back to her house, but finally I guess she gave up and we finally ended up in an apartment complex near my brother’s office, she parked the car in a small place and walked towards me, now she looks less pissed. “Now you are a creepy stalker car thief Ashlyn Harris.” She said and then she smiled. And right now there is no way to describe; there are no words in the world that could make justice to how beautiful she is when she smiles.

“It’s always a pleasure warrior princess” I said with a smile, she rolled her eyes and headed to the door; she looked back at me and smiled again. “You are not going to give me a goodnight kiss Alexandra?” I asked she just laughed and took my breath away; she walked towards me and gave me a genuine smile.

“I already told you Ashlyn Harris, I hate girls like you.” She said as she moved closer to me, with one hand she took my cheek and whispered in my ear making my heart jump. “Good night Ashlyn.”

“Good night warrior princess.” I whispered back and waited until she was out of my sight to head back home.

 

 

 


	3. Love is when you can’t breathe

It’s been a week since I arrived here, every night I found myself out of the cemetery we buried Hope after the accident, but I wasn’t strong enough to go and visit her grave. After I visiting the cemetery I just drive without direction. Today after finishing work I asked my brother if I can drive his car today, I wasn’t feeling like driving my motorcycle, today was the day Hope gave me as a present my bike and I was too emotional to ride it.

I parked the car for a second over the streets and closed my eyes, today was a special day for me, and every second of the day remind me of it. Hope gave me her motorcycle the day she got her a new one, we have been friends for almost a year then and she thought it was a better option to give it to me than to selling it to some random stranger. That is also the reason why I don’t let anyone drive it besides me.

I opened my eyes and started driving slowly and trying to control my emotions, when I was getting back to normal, I saw a familiar silhouette and I knew who she was the moment I felt my heart start beating faster, but when she looked around and I saw her face I was one completely sure it was her. “Hey warrior princess” I screamed and she apparently didn’t heard me, so I tried again. “Warrior princess!” She looked around and spots me in my brother’s car, she walked towards me.

“Ashlyn Harris” She said and smiled at me, my heart jumped and I could swear it will go out of my throat, god this woman is beyond beautiful. “Are you showing me your new stolen acquisition?” She asked as she looked at the car and winked at me. She drives me crazy, and I just have seen her twice in my life, where is she from? Not from this planet I am sure.

“It’s my brother’s… pretty cool right?” I said with a smile on my face, she just gave me a small smile and looked away, before she started walking I spoke again “Do you want me to ride you home?” I asked boldly and she just looked at me with a raised eyebrow, but before I could say something else she jumped inside of the car.

“Let’s drive Ashlyn Harris.” She playfully hit my arm the same way she did when I “stole” her car keys.

“What happened to your car?” I asked when we stopped at the first traffic light, I forgot she had one when I offered her a ride home.

“My brother and I take turns, he always forget to pick me up at work when he is driving it.” She answers and I just laughed, so apparently her brother just stood her up.

“That makes me your knight in shining armor that rescued the princess from walking home?” I asked laughing and she just smiled at me.

“You are everything but a knight in shining armor to me.” She affirmed and I just looked at her with my best ‘I feel offended’ look, she smiled again and winked at me.

“So you leave work at this time every day?” I tried to continue a normal friendly conversation with her, maybe this was a start to try and fix all the wrong things we both did when we first met, I wanted to give her a new impression of my person.

“No, on Wednesday, today I have my free night in my other job, and my free complete day is on Friday, I also have my mornings free on Saturdays.” She answered me, I didn’t say anything else but I guess she just read my mind because after a few second she just continued talking. “One job pays the bills, the other one my passion for photography.” She affirmed and then looked back at me, I smiled at her.

“So you like photography.” I stated as I continued driving all the ways she tried to lose me the first time I followed her home, it gave us time before I had to say goodbye to her.

“Me and my brother, we took a lot of photos of ourselves in landscapes and stuff like that, we like photographing people.” She smiled as she got lost in her thoughts, then she started biting her lip and looked down, if I weren’t paying more attention to the road I could have seen the moment she took out her camera and shot at me, but I just realized that when it was all done.

“Okay, what the hell are you doing?” I looked at her when I finally reached a red traffic light; she just shook her head ‘no’ and put her camera back in her bag and smiled at me.

“Well in some cultures they believe when somebody take a photo of you just captured your soul.” She said with a smile and then started laughing. “Now I have a piece of your soul in my camera Ashlyn Harris.” She continued as she winked at me and smiled pointing at the traffic light which just turned green.

We finally reached her house and I didn’t want to say goodbye just yet, call it destiny or whatever bullshit people believe in but that day I felt like every single thing in my life was the reason why I was there, looking at the most beautiful girl I’ve seen in my life just the second I parked in front of her apartment building. “Safe and home warrior princess.” I said and she smiled, then she looked down at her feet.

“You want to come in?” She asked me and I just nodded my head, she smiled and opened the door “This is my way to try and fix the fact that the first time I was supper mean to you.” She said again and I just smiled at her, she looked down at her feet with a shy smile, God, this woman is surely a fallen beautiful angel.

When I entered to the building we started climbing up the stairs until we reached the last floor, I didn’t complained about the fact that we could easily took the elevator and reached her apartment way faster. She opened her door and made a gesture to invite me to come in. When I entered I found that the living room just had a sofa, a T.V. and thousands of photos all over the walls.

Most of the photos were just landscapes with people walking; some of them were beautiful sceneries without a soul in it, I was sure one hundred percent of the photos looked super artistic, like pieces of a modern art museum or something. I got lost looking at the photos I almost forgot Ali was just standing awkwardly behind me.

“What do you think about them?” She asked and I just smiled, she was talented, I could tell. And right in front of me I just had one of the best photographers I’ve ever met (not that I’ve met that much actually).

“You are very talented. When you open a gallery please invite me” I affirmed and her smile just grew, and woah, just woah, she took my breath right the second I saw her nose crinkle. I was getting lost in her eyes when she asked me if I wanted a glass of water, I said yes and she went into her kitchen, that moment I started looking around the apartment.

“You will be the first one to get an invitation.” She said and I continued looking around. The place was big, they had the living room, kitchen and dining room, and three bedrooms; I walked towards one of the rooms, apparently used as a small storage room, when I saw it…

It was a big picture of the carnival of cultures in Berlin, there it was a man as the center of attention smiling like he was having the time of his life, his face was painted and he was throwing something in the air, at the background a sea of people walking in all directions, the beauty of the carnival was captured in that photo and the piece itself took my breath away, I’ve never seen a photo as beautiful as the one I was looking at, I heard the camera shot and looked at Ali’s direction she was smiling and started talking.

“He is my brother last year, we were in the…”

“Carnival of cultures Berlin.” I finished her sentence before looking back at her, I thought that was an acquisition she made to some famous artist, but this girl is extremely talented and once again she just surprised me again. “I was there too.” I confessed with a smile and looked at the photo again, it was extremely good. “You lived in Berlin too?” I asked, she just shook her head.

“I lived in Frankfurt, but that day we decided to take the train and made the long trip just to visit the carnival and take some good photos.” She said with a smile and she looked down at her feet, her cheeks turned a little red and in that moment I didn’t understand why. “This one is my favorite, the best photo in my collection.”

“Yeah, it’s beyond amazing, girl you got the talent.” I stated and she just smiled again. “I didn’t know the motorcycle burglar has talent.” I said playfully and she just rolled her eyes.

“Once again I say I wasn’t trying to steal it I just was taking a closer look to it, I’ve never ride a motorcycle.” She confessed.

“Well one thing is for sure, you are never going to ride mine.” I said with a little laugh, she rolled her eyes again and threw me the glass of water in my face.

“Once again the A for asshole makes her apparition right?” She asked and laughed at my confusion expression when I opened my eyes after she just threw the water at me.

“You know something, mean warrior princess; I am a very revengeful person.” I said and she started running away from me, I followed her and jumped so we finished in the floor, I started tickling her and she started laughing, I was planning to do that the moment I saw her nose crinkle, I just needed the perfect moment and this was it. But suddenly we heard a key trying to open the door; she stood up really quickly from our position and started pushing me towards her bedroom. “Alexandra Krieger what the hell are you doing?! We just met a week ago!” I said playfully but she shushed me up and pushed me inside her closet.

I was confused until I heard a man’s voice “Hey Ali!” the voice said and I could hear his steps, getting closer to where Ali was. “I am sorry I forgot to pick you up! But hey, you are here early!”

“Yeah a friend drove me home, thank you very much Kyle.” She said and I felt her hand pushing the door so it would close.

“I didn’t know you have friends and why is the floor wet?” He asked again and Ali just gave him a really bad excuse about tripping when she was walking with a glass of water, he started laughing. “I am heading back to work little sister! Behave!” He said, after a few seconds I heard the door close again and then the closet door opened.

“Were you trying to kidnap me warrior princess?” I asked with a smile, she rolled her eyes and started walking back to the living room.

“I panicked what do you want me to say?”

“Pretty much anything but I panicked, no wonder why you don’t have friends!” I laughed and she just gave me a small harmless punch in my arm, she laughed with me and her nose crinkled, I love when she does that.

“I don’t have friends HERE, but I have plenty in Germany and in D.C.” she said with a smile and then looked back at me. “And I guess I could call you a friend.” She confessed with a raised eyebrow and I just smiled again.

“So before Germany you lived in D.C.” I asked and she just nodded her head. “Cool, I’ve only lived here and in Germany.” I confess and she smiles at me. Just when we are about to say our goodbyes I had another idea. “Do you want to come to a party Friday night?” I boldly asked and she just looked at me with a surprised look. “You know, now that you say we are friends I guess you can go with me. It’s me and a bunch of old friends giving me a welcome back party, so, you say yes?” I asked again.

“It sounds like fun, so why not Ashlyn.” She said and I felt happy she said yes.

“Okay, I pick you up here at eight o’clock at night” I stated and then took out my phone and handled to her. “I think you should give me your number, just in case.” I asked and she just started laughing.

“Sure, creepy stalker Ashlyn Harris.” She said as she took my phone off my hand and started typing her number.

After I left her home I started driving towards the cemetery, I parked the car and looked at the place, I wasn’t prepared to see the grave again so I didn’t get inside to search it. I just stood there for an hour or so before I started driving again to the apartment I shared with Chris, when I finally made it I parked the car and said hello to my brother who was way more worried about the car and what could have I done to it.

“Really Chris I just left a friend at her apartment.” I said when he asked why I was arriving that late. I entered to my room and took my phone out of my pocket, I searched for Ali’s name and when I found it I texted her ‘goodnight warrior princess’ I put my phone in my stomach and a few minutes later I got the answer.

‘Goodnight car thief Ashlyn Harris.’ I smiled at the screen of my phone and closed my eyes and let out a long breath, she takes my breath away, sometimes I swear to god: when I’m with her I can’t breathe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember if you've read the book or watched the movie this story is based on, I changed a lot of stuff and just kept the essence


	4. Love is absurd

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mistakes are mine, this chapter was a "hurry finally I got time to write" thing so I didn't check it, huge sorry for any mistake

I arrived at eight o’clock that night, I was eager to see her; this time I brought my motorcycle, I will not let her drive it, but she could ride with me as a passenger, that should be enough right? I am going to take her to one of my friend’s restaurant I just found out she has. There would be a previous meet up before heading to the club where I’m meeting Kelley later tonight. When I informed her about my arrival I smiled at the absurd feeling of anxiousness about seeing her.

“Oh! So you are letting me ride with you?” I heard her voice and my heart started beating faster, absurd again, but just looking at her smile is a reasonable reason so, no, it is not absurd.

“Yeah, but don’t get too excited, you are one of many.” I said to her, but mostly to myself, I’m not sure why I just want to tell me she is another girl, another one of my conquest, or other one of my friends, it’s absurd to think she could be something more. But when I saw her rolling her eyes at my statement, the idea of her being something more it’s not absurd at all.

“You tell that to all of your conquest?” She said as she walked towards me with a smile on her face, I handled my other helmet and she gave me a small smile.

“I told that to every girl that have slept in my bed.” I told her with a smile and she just shook her head and put on the helmet. “If you want to hug me tight, you can.” I told her as she got on the vehicle and tried hard to just hold my jacket in her fist. “I don’t bite warrior princess.”

“I know, but I also know you steal cars.” She said the moment she wrapped her arms around my waist and whispered in my ear, my body started feeling full of electricity but I just decided to ignore the feeling and started driving to my friend’s restaurant. Our way was quiet, I remembered the last time I drove with somebody but immediately blocked the memory, the last person who rode with me was Christen, but Ali is not her, Ali is way better than her.

When we finally arrived to the restaurant, I opened the door and found the complete gang sitting there, I smiled when they looked at me like if they were looking at a ghost, and Megan was the first one to stand up and tackled me in a hug. “Oh my god A, you are back!” She said in the embrace and I just hugged her back. She turned around and shouted to the girls sitting in the table. “Look everybody the famous A is back!” They all started hugging me and saying polite hello’s to Ali.

“Guys, this is Ali, a girl I met the day I came back.” I told them and they just waved hello at her.

“Woah, two weeks here and you already started building your reputation again?” a voice said in the back of the room, when I looked up someone’s blue eyes met mine.

“So funny Morgan, I don’t get why your boyfriend is still with you.” I told her and she just laughed at me, I know she was laughing at my lame attempt to return the joke; I would be laughing at me also. “But any way, Ali let me introduce to this bunch of losers.”

“I think the only loser here is you.” She said with a smile and everybody in the room started laughing.

“I just know her name but I like her already, anyway nice to meet you Ali, my name is Megan.” My blonde friend said and just went back to her seat at the table they were sitting.

“Thank you mean warrior princess, well, since you seem to already feel comfortable with them, they are Megan, Tobin, Whitney, Niki and the asshole over there is Alex like you, but she is not some warrior princess, she is just Morgan.” I said and everybody just looked at me with a questioning look, of course they didn’t knew about our little joke.

“Again, the only A for asshole I know here is you.” She smiled as everybody started laughing and she also started high fiving everybody until Megan invited her to seat next to her.

“I can’t believe I’ve never thought about the A for asshole.” Megan said as everybody started laughing again.

The time passed really fast, I told them some of my stories about Germany, also Ali told some stories about herself, I am surprised about how easy was for her to get along with them, they filled me up with their lives after I left, most of them stopped running illegal races but they also knew the asshole who stole the ring was now the one who organizes them, I closed my fists when I heard her name.  But the conversation was interrupted by my phone ringing: Kelley was calling.

“What’s up Kell?” I answered my phone and went out of the room in order to let them continue talking.

“A! I’m heading to the club right now!” she told me and I was about to answer her when I heard laughter in the room where everyone was, I looked inside the room and saw Ali moving her arm like trying to imitate some kind of dance and everybody was laughing at it, I almost forgot I had my phone next to my ear but Kelley brought me back to reality. “A are you still there?”

“Yeah sure, see you in 30.” I told her before I hang up and made my way back to the room. “Guys time to continue this party!” I shouted and everybody cheered back.

The gang went immediately to Megan’s car and me and Ali with my motorcycle, they took advantage while I was handling Ali the helmet and unsuccessfully trying to turn my motorcycle on. “Okay let me help you.” Ali said the moment I started getting frustrated with it, I just looked at her, there is no way I would let her handle this situation, that’s absurd! “Oh I promise I will not steal it, just want to help you.” She said again and I just shook my head no. “Come on!”

“You have never ridden one, so it’s impossible you could fix one princess.” I told her with almost anger in my voice, she just rolled her eyes and pushed me hard away from my motorcycle, I don’t know what surprised me more, the fact that she was way stronger than I thought or the fact that in a matter of seconds my bike was working just like always. “How could you…?”

“Oh tough girl, it’s been ages since the princesses started getting out hands dirty!” She said laughing at my surprised expression.

“So you lied to me, you’ve ride a motorcycle before!” I said at her but she shook her head no.

“No, my dad had the same Honda vf750 custom, but he never let me ride it or ride with him ‘its way too dangerous’ he always told me.” She said and a small smile appeared in her lips, seriously, where is this girl from? Heaven? “Anyway he let me watch him when he repaired it.” She admitted and then looked at me with a raised eyebrow “Are we going or you are going to stand there looking like an idiot.”

“You are never ridding it anyway.” I told her with a smile on my face and she just jumped right behind me and hugged my waist.

“Shut up and drive Ashlyn Harris.”

We drive in silence again; it is so comfortable with her. When we finally arrived I immediately walked towards the place Kelley and I always met, just when I was about to arrive I felt her arms around my neck and the weight of her body over me. “A! God is so good to be able to see you at least once a week, I really missed that.” She confessed with a smile and then looked at Ali who was just looking at us with a little smile.

“Kell, this is my new friend Ali.” I told her with a smile and she just looked at her and then back at me, my heart started beating faster when I saw that spark in her eyes and her smile growing on her face.

“Oh, Nice to meet you Ali.” Kelley said and they both shook their hands.

“Apparently you need some time alone, so I’m going to get some drinks, want something?” Ali said with a smile and Kelley just told her that she was ok right now. “And for you Ashlyn?” she asked and I saw the way Kelley’s eyes opened widely. I don’t know what happened to my heart the moment she said my name but my next action was motived by pure impulse. I wrapped her and pulled her closer, her face inches away from mine.

“I just want a warrior-princess.” She looked at me and for a moment I got lost in her beautiful brown eyes, I tried to sound funny but I just sounded eager, but thank god she just pulled me away and started laughing.

“So funny Ashlyn Harris, be right back.” She winked at me and I just stood there as I watched her leave.

“Woah, what was that?” Kelley asked the moment Ali got lost in the sea of people all over the club.

“I was joking, you know” I said, more to myself, that complete interaction was absurd, actually the fact that I met Ali and tried to be her friend instead of a one night thing when I am super attracted to her was absurd.

“Yeah, and I was born yesterday.” She told me with a smile and I just rolled my eyes, “If you like her you should try something with her.”

“She is not Christen” I said out loud but immediately my brain went to the same conclusion it did before, she is better than Christen, for sure.

“I also find hard to not compare every girl or boy I like with Hope.” Kelley said with a sad smile and I also could see the tears in her eyes. She started playing with her fingers and tried hard to control her tears. “But thanks god that girl is not Christen.” I hugged her the moment she broke down and started crying in my embrace. “She changed so much A, she is no longer what she used to be, and I miss my best friend.” She cried and I tried hard to not break too.

“We all changed.”

“But not like her.” She confirmed and then looked at me, I saw all the pain in her eyes, I knew I ran away like a coward the moment I lost my best friend, but I was a selfish idiot who never thought about Kelley, who also lost her lover and her best friend. We looked at each other eyes what I feel like an eternity until I felt her lips on mine. 

“Kelley what is going on?” I manage to ask her as I pulled gently away from me, I tried not to sound rude, but this whole situation just took me by surprise.

“Oh my god, A, no, sorry this was a misunderstanding.” She apologized and then continued talking. “It’s just that you are the only thing that reminds me she was real.” She confessed with tears in her eyes and then hugged me again; she buried her face and held me closer. “I miss her so much, every day.”

“I miss her too.” I whispered in her ear and waited until she calmed down.

“Fall in love again A.” Kelley suddenly said and it took me by surprise. “Ali, she seems good for you, and I can tell you like her.” She smiled at me and winked, I just denied with my head but the smile that was coming across my face the moment I spotted her coming with the drinks was undeniable.

“Hey, sorry it took me so long, there were a lot of people at the bar.” She told us and handled Kelley a blue drink, a beer to me. “And I also was dancing with Alex and Tobin down there, want to come?” Ali asked to both of us and Kelley just started laughing.

“Good luck with that Ali, she never dances.” Kelley shouted to her as she put her arm around my shoulders.

“Oh… is she afraid of looking like a fool?” Ali asked with a devilish smile in her face, Kelley raised an eyebrow and I looked at both of them. I quickly wrapped Ali’s waist with my arms and looked at her in the eyes.

“If the warrior princess wants to dance, let’s dance.” I whispered and moved with her still in my arms towards the dance floor.

After dancing almost a dozen songs and a little more chatting with Kelley and the others I asked her if she wanted to leave, she nodded and we both said goodbye to all the gang. Once again the road back to her apartment was silent and comfortable; the only thing that was going as fast as it could was my heart every time I remembered Kelley’s words saying that I liked the girl I was driving home. We arrived at her house and I can’t help but hold on the idea this was just platonic and part of Kelley’s enormous imagination.

“So, you are not giving me a good night kiss princess?” absurd, why was I asking that? Damn Kelley and her damn imagination. But my heart skipped a beat the moment I felt her arms around my neck and one of her hands playing with my hair. Her face for the second time that night was just inches away from mine.

“How many times I’ve to tell you Ashlyn Harris: I hate girls like you.” She said in a whisper and then looked down at my lips. “It would be absurd to kiss somebody I hate, right?” she told me, still looking at my lips.

“The absurd things are the ones that make this world move.” I told her, with my heart pounding in my chest, she raised an eyebrow and then looked back at my lips and I closed my eyes waiting for her to just close the space between us.

“Good night Ashlyn Harris.” She whispered and I felt her lips on my cheek, not what I was expecting but my heart didn’t care, it started beating faster than ever before. “But how could I explain how would it be if one day the moon falls in love with the sun.”

“That doesn’t make sense.” I told her as I opened my eyes smiling at her. “That is absurd.”

“Yes, Ashlyn Harris, you and I are absurd.” She confessed as she walked away to her building. Yes, I know, we are absurd. And for me that is also absurd.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally! I could update this chapter! Sorry if it took long, but I am moving all over Europe (I study arts in France but you already know I am from Spain), and right now I am having a little trouble keeping up moving from one country thru another for vacations so maybe I will take a lot of time for the next update, but I am not leaving this! ;)


	5. The graffiti over the bridge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Special Note: As always I repeat this story is based on the Spanish film “Tengo ganas de ti” which is also based in the Italian book by Federico Moccia “Ho voglia di te.” This chapter is (kind of) divided in two parts, the first one, is a series of events that happen near the end of the original movie/book, but to be honest, from my standpoint (I am no authority to professionally criticize it), the idea of ‘closing’ that storyline in that part of the plot, and in that way, to make it more dramatic, was extremely weak, so I originally planned not adding it to THIS story.BUT (here comes the but) I saw the Italian movie “ho voglia di te” (based on Moccia’s book of course) a few days ago, and I decided to use an element from it that is not used in the Spanish movie nor in the book, so I used the weak argument and transfer it to this part of the story; so I could use it as an excuse for the second part of this chapter that is going to help me with that element, I am going to use in the future, that the Italian movie had. SO in a few words… hope you enjoy it. And finally photography aestheticism is a technique where you modify the photo after it is printed with different elements that give it texture and different meaning.

I know it’s not right to be in a party in the middle of the week, but Kelley invited me again and I decided to come. This time we were just the two of us hanging out, we really enjoyed each other’s company, and if I had to come up with a good thing about my past, my friendship with Kelley will certainly fill the bill. Kelley leaved to get some drinks and then started dancing with a handsome guy, and I was just looking around the club when I saw her, Chirsten’s little sister.

I followed her, something inside my mind told me she will lead me to her sister, something deep inside me just wanted to saw her for one last time. I wasn’t even sure if I still feel the same about her, but I am completely sure we never got a closure on what we were. A stupid fight ruined everything about us. I followed her from far away until I noticed she was crying, and she was also way drunk.

“Angie?” I asked doubtfully, I was sure about whom she was, but I didn’t want to sound so eager about finding her in this place, I was also worried about her and the fact she was not emotionally fine. She turned around and her eyes grew wide.

“A?” She asked as she tried to wipe her tears away from her face, I move closer to her and wiped them with my thumbs, she smiled at me. “A, you are back.” She said again and hugged me tight; I felt her tears in my shoulder but just hold still.

“Yeah, I am back.” I confirmed as I separated her from myself “What happen? Are you ok?” I asked again, she gave me a small smile and moved her head ‘no’.

“I made a huge mistake, but don’t worry, I will be fine.” She told me and then her smile grew a little more. “Christen will be so happy when she finds out you are back.” She confessed as I froze, just the mention of her name was painful enough. I am not so sure she will be glad I am back in town, but I also know I can’t let her sister go alone in her state.

“Come on Angie, I need to leave you home.” I said with a little smile as I offered her my arm, I send a text to Kelley saying I will leave since I got to work tomorrow, I know it’s a lie, but I am also aware how much the fact she lost her best friend affects her.

The ride back to her home was quiet, I was holding next to the taxi with my motorcycle, she fall asleep half way back, I didn’t knew how should I feel, a part of me wanted to run out of that taxi, wanted to leave the money to the driver and leave, but I took responsibility of the girl sleeping on the back seat of the taxi, so I know I need to leave her safe and back in her home.

Watching the house just made me nostalgic; I waited until Angie got inside the house. After I saw the living room light turn off, I stayed a few more minutes in the street and I was about to put my helmet on when I heard her voice, the voice I was trying to forget four years ago when I left for Germany, the voice that used to own my heart.

“So it’s true, you are back.” Christen said in almost a whisper, her voice pierced my heart, it was painful to hear it, I was so in love with her that just the memory of my broken heart was enough.

“Christen…” That was the only thing that came out of my mind the moment I saw her, she looked almost the same, she had tears in her eyes just like me, but my heart didn’t beat as fast as it used to beat, I didn’t feel tree steps above heaven, it was nothing like before.

“You are back” She said again and gave me a genuine smile, the one I used to love, the one I used to live for. She moved closer to me and crashed me in a hug. “You are back.” She said again, and I closed my eyes as I hold her close. I froze the moment I felt her lips on mine. But then I kissed her back, it was familiar, but I didn’t feel the electricity running down my body like I used to feel, I didn’t feel the urge to keep kissing her, I felt nothing.

I don’t know why I kept kissing her, I kissed her again and again until the kisses where not enough, I felt how our bodies moved without losing the intimacy of the contact, we had enough time to go back into her place, in her garage, I know my ways, apparently even with Christen, once I start I can’t stop myself, and this could not harm me, just one last time, or maybe this is going to be the start of our forever. I felt her hands undressing me, I moved mine to undress her, and we haven’t stopped since we started, until she pushed me away.

“We can’t do this A.” She said in a whisper, and moved away from me.

“I think I know what you mean.” I said back, I just feel weird, this could have been an indicator that we could be something again, that we had another chance, but to be honest with myself I didn’t want another chance with her.

“I was trying to figure out if I still feel something for you.” She said with tears in her eyes, and it was painful to hear, a confirmation, we didn’t belong to each other, and we can’t be together, a confirmation this is doomed, I felt the tears in my eyes threatening to come out. “I am engaged.” She stated and I felt how my heart cracked again, the world stopped, just like the time she broke up with me, this was it, this was our closure.

“I am sorry, I shouldn’t have kissed you.” I said, and I sounded like an idiot.

“I kissed you first.” She said with a shy smile. “I am sorry.”

“I know. Hope you are happy.” That’s my final word, I went out and ran away as fast as I could, I wanted to punch something, I wanted to scream, I wanted to cry all I have to cry, and the moment I was near the damn bridge, I saw the graffiti, and I know, that thing has to disappear. I kept running, I kept crying and wiping my tears away from my face.

* * *

 

I arrived to the closest department store, it was a little past midnight, so it’s obviously almost empty, and I quickly moved to the painting department and took almost all the black cans I saw. I know it was like screaming to the world I was about to commit vandalism once again in my life, but honestly I didn’t care.

“You should try street art instead of vandalism, you know.” Just the moment I recognized the voice my heart started beating faster than ever, I left the can of paint in her place again to turn around and saw her, and there they were, the most beautiful brown eyes I’ve ever seen.

“What are you doing here in the middle of the night warrior princess?” I asked, I know my voice sounded super aggressive and I think I should apologize, but she answered me before I could try to.

“Well now I know you are not in the mood for jokes, so I’m going to go straight to the point. I came here after work to buy some things I need for a project of photography aestheticism.” She said and showed me some colored sheets of paper, glue, paint brushes and a watercolor paint palette, I felt bad for answering so rude before, she sounded so excited about that photography whatever.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to sound rude.” I apologize and she gave me a small smile. “So, what you were saying about not doing vandalism?” I asked with a smile on my face as I showed her the bottle cans I had. She started laughing, her nose crinkle and I swear the world started moving in a new direction I was not familiar with.

“Street art is better than just making graffiti randomly everywhere.”

“I kind of want to cover a graffiti.” I confess as I took another can of black paint but before I could put it with the rest, she started putting the other cans back to the shelf.

“That’s a bigger reason to try street art. Come on, you could take this bottles” she said as she took four cans of blue paint. “A little of this.” She continued as she took three bottles of a light brown paint. “Two of these.” She took two bottles of white paint, and then two of black paint. “And let’s go and cover that graffiti of yours.” She said again as she moved to the cashier.

I drove in silence with her holding me, it was a peaceful night and I could also feel my beating heart against my chest, sometimes I think this girl is going to be the dead of me, the way she made my heart jump like crazy is not normal, and the way my heart manage to keep beating that fast when she is near or just at the thought of her amazes me. We finally arrived to the bridge; I parked my motorcycle and helped her to get in the small space that helped me that one time I wrote the words in front of us.

“I always wondered what this means.” She said with a small smile as she opened the bag that contained all the paint we bought.

“You and Me Three Steps Above Heaven.” I said as I try to contain all the anger that is growing inside me,   I feel so betrayed, Christen just used me to prove she was ready to marry whoever she was going to marry, that was not fair, she had no right.

“Are you going to tell me your story or I will just help you to erase this.” She asked as she started painting in blue the top part of the wall.

“I loved somebody really much, didn’t work out, it’s time to move on.” I said as I took another blue bottle and start helping her with the paint.

“You should write a letter to that person.” She said with a small smile as we continued painting, I looked at her like if she was crazy. “You write all the things you feel, it could be pages and pages with your feelings or just a single word, then you burn it, and you will feel better, and you will not keep what you feel inside.” She said again as she threw the bottle to the floor and took out another one to continue painting the remaining wall. I did the same.

“What are we painting anyway?” I abruptly changed the subject, this was going too personal, and I really don’t want to let somebody else in my life again, it will finish with hurt and pain, I can’t handle doing that to her. The most perfect girl I’ve ever met.

“I loved the Baltic beaches; we are painting one of them.” She said with a big smile as we both finished with the blue paint. “What does “three steps above heaven” means?” She asked again. I kind of hate when she asks, because for some reason I can’t lie to her, I also can’t tell her ‘no’.

“I was having a hard time in my life, when I was with her was the only moment of the day I felt happy, I felt like three steps above heaven.” I said with a sad smile as I tried to hold my tears. “But then something really bad happened and I ran away to Germany.” When I finished speaking, she moved closer to me and gave me a kiss on the cheek, I was glad the light was as its minimum in the street, otherwise she will see how my eyes opened and my cheeks turned red, how she manages to do that?

“You should forgive yourself Ashlyn, and if you ever need someone to talk to… you know where to find me.” She said with a bright smile and I smiled back at her. We continued painting almost all night, I got to say; the image in front of us is beautiful, I looked really amazing, like a beach vacation promotional. I smile as I took a moment to contemplate our little piece of art.

“And we finished warrior princess.” I said with a small smile as put my arm around her shoulders.

“We should sign it, you know.” She smiled at me and gave me the last can of black paint in my hand, I wrote and ‘A’ in the low right corner, she took the bottle and painted an ampersand and an ‘AK’ next to my ‘A’. “Now it is finished my friend.” She said with a big smile and hugged me.

I drove her back to her home, it was the least I could do after all she did for me tonight. “Ok warrior princes, safe and home!” I said as I took out my helmet as she did the same and gave it back to me. She said goodbye to me and then started moving towards the door of the apartment building. I just started driving back to my place trying to hold a smile that was threatening to appear on my face.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Earlier update than I thought, thanks for you comments I appreciate them a lot, sorry for all the mistakes.


	6. Love is when you miss

Ricorderò e comunque e so che non vorrai /I will forever remember you even if you don’t want

Ti chiamerò perché tanto non risponderai/I will call you even if you don’t answer

Come fa ridere adesso pensarti come a un gioco/Now I laugh at the thought of you being just a game

E nell'ansia che ti perdo ti scatterò una foto/At the fear of losing you I will take a photo of you

-Ti scatterò una foto by Tiziano Ferro

 

I miss her, I know it’s only been a week since the last time I saw her but I am sure I miss her, Ali. I miss her beautiful brown eyes and that smile… Every day at every second I am thinking about her, it’s driving me crazy. Today I can’t even make my work properly I’ve been for almost an hour just staring at the screen in front of me.

“Ash, are you ok?” My brother asked me with a concerned voice just when he came here to my cubicle, I was still lost in my thoughts, thinking about her, I try to find a good reason to be off today but honestly the only thing I think about is Alexandra Krieger.

“Yeah, I am just thinking about some things.” I said and then I realized how stupid that sounded, like really I could have said I was thinking about flying cows jumping in the sky and it will make the exact same sense.

“Is it about, you know, Hope?” He asked and I appreciate the fact that he treats really carefully all the subjects about me; he is the only one who knows almost all the story about Hope, and he is one of the few people that knows I have been in jail. “Or is it about that guy?” He asks again and I just shook my head.

“Nothing about that, it’s something completely different.”

“So, is it about Christen?” He asks ones again, I wish I had seen the face I made because my brother just started laughing really hard. “Okay, so at least you’ve moved on and got over her.” He says again and I just laugh with him. “Okay, so tell me what is it?” He asks again and I quickly try to find a good excuse that doesn’t sound absurd, something far from ‘I miss a beautiful girl with brown eyes I think about all day.’

“I was just thinking if I should go back to practice box.” I randomly said, actually is not a complete lie, sometimes I just think about going to some gym and practice it again, I used to be the best.

“Cool, you know, I’ve heard great things about a gym that is two blocks away. They had a cool box ring, also cardio and weight areas.” He said and I just smiled back at him. “You should go after we leave, it’s really near and as far as I know they close at midnight so you have plenty of time to check it out!” I just smiled at him and nodded my head, what did I get myself into?

After that chat with my brother I tried to focus on work, I managed to at least finish what I had for today a few hours later than my leaving schedule. I turned off the computer and took my stuff just to leave when I remembered my brother told me about the gym, I had nothing to lose just by going and take a look at it, maybe I convince myself into practicing box again, should be fun. I get on my motorcycle and started driving back home to get some sport clothes and then to the gym.

The place was really big, and it also looked fancy, thank god I make good money working with my brother. I talked to the guy in the administration and he told me they had different programs of training, but if I decided to be part of the community (yes they talk about their clients as a community) the first month I could chose a personal trainer and have free classes of some activity for a month. I thought about it just for a second before agreeing.

The guy in the administration told me I could have a tour that night before incorporating to the “community” the next day, so I entered the place and started looking around, the first thing I did was trying to find the box ring, I started walking away from the cardio and the weight part to the stairs that were at the back at the gym, they also were divided in two parts, one way ended up in the swimming pool and the other ones in the “group classes and functional area.” I guess that was the zone I was searching for.

The stairs led me to a corridor full of glass walls, inside the rooms people were doing some dancing and what I suppose is yoga, past those rooms there was an area for functional training and some small squash courts and next to them I finally saw the box area, the ring and about five punching sacks, on the ring there were two guys fighting, but the moment I focused my sight on the sacks my heart started beating fast, like it always did when I saw her.

She was teaching some random girl how to punch correctly; she looked so beautiful on that stupid gym uniform: a red sleeveless shirt with the words “personal trainer” on the back, and a long black short, both with the logo of the gym. She was laughing with the girl about the really bad punching she did and then corrected her form, I was hypnotized. But I needed to be near her.

“Oh, look at this, apparently the princess is such a warrior!” I said as I moved closer to them, she looked up and smiled at me, god, it was only a week but how much I missed her.

“Whoa! Still the creepy stalker Ashlyn Harris?” She said and moved closer to me with a big smile, I just smiled back at her.

“I didn’t know you work here.”  Seriously, that was the worst thing that could’ve come into my mind in that moment. But I always looked like an idiot in front of her, so I tried to play it cool.

“Yeah, this is my famous night job.” She said as she moved back to the girl on the punching bag and corrected her again. “If you want to know, during the morning I work in the art museum.” She smiled at me and I smiled back at her as I moved closer.

“And here? You are the pretty girl with the round number?” I asked as I raised an eyebrow, she rolled her eyes and threw a punch at me; thank god I got good reflexes and managed to pull back on time.

“I guess you can’t read, my shirt says ‘personal trainer’ and I guess yours should say ‘asshole’” she answered with a smile and then gave me a small punch on my shoulder. “I bet I could beat you in a matter of minutes.” She confidently said as she pushed me with her boxing glove.

“You want to bet?” I asked as I moved closer to her, my face was just inches away from her, and suddenly my brain shut down and all I could think about was the urge I had to kiss her. I didn’t even heard what she said until I felt the glove on my cheek. “Sorry warrior princess got lost in my thoughts.” Most likely on my desire to kiss you senseless until my lips hurt. “What were you saying?”

 “What do you want to bet?” She asks with a little smile a she cross her arms in front of her. And I want to scream that all I want is, well, her. And to be honest, sometimes just be this close to her is enough.

“Diner, loser buys diner.” I said, it’s going to be a win for me in both cases, I just want to see her, I just want to be with her, I don’t want to miss her presence again, and I just want her.

“I am warning you, I have an expensive taste.” She said and started walking towards the ring where the two guys were fighting. “Hey, Henry, let me beat this blondie ass.” She said as she pointed at me when one of the guys looked at her.

“Sure Ali!” He said as he left the ring with the other guy he was fighting with, Ali stepped inside the arena and made a motion at me, I also get on the place.

“Okay warrior princess, I promise I will be good with you.” I said as I got on my upright stance. She just rolled her eyes and did the same.

We started with the fight, Ali was really good, almost my level good, I am not saying I am the best woman on box, but I am completely sure I’ve never fought with a girl as good as I am. Or maybe a crucial factor is the fact I really don’t want to hurt her and all I’ve done is avoid her jabs. I moved closer to her, I was getting tired, maybe it was the long time I’ve done nothing, so I did the most common technique in those cases, I clinched, really close to her.

I felt her heavy breathing on my ear and her warm body close to me; I would be lying if I say that didn’t turn me on. I felt my heart start beating fast, no surprise, but I also felt my body aching to just do something about this attraction, this beautiful and perfect attraction I have for the most perfect girl in the world. My brain shut down, I couldn’t think straight, all I wanted was kiss her, hold her closer to me, confess to her the fact that I think about her every single minute, and I start missing her the moment she is out of my sight, I just want to scream the fact that I want her.

I don’t remember when I hit the floor or why I stayed there instead of getting up and continue with the fight, I just remember the feel of her body near me, I just remember the beating of my heart, and I smile at the thought of it. “Okay loser, the count to ten ended like ten minutes ago, and now they’re announcing the gym is closing in ten minutes, so I suggest we go and take a shower.”

“Together?” I asked with a smile, but I was not smiling at my stupid joke, I was smiling at the thought of showering with her.

“Oh, there is the asshole again! Thank god, I thought we lost you.” She said laughing as she helped me getting up. “Really Ashlyn, I think you shouldn’t let me win. I mean I train people, I am not that weak.” She made a statement; even if I wanted to lie I know I couldn’t.

“I am sorry I just didn’t want to hurt you or even hit you, also,  I didn’t let you win, I was trying to get you tired and then just take you down. But I got distracted.” I confess as we entered the lockers, a few ladies were there just preparing to leave or to take a shower.

“Distracted by what?” She asked as she took out her shirt, well, if I could talk right now or even move I will surely just answer that question with getting her a mirror so she could look how hot and beautiful she is. “Ashlyn?” She asks as she moves closer to me, I just shook my head and quickly took the towel.

“Sorry, nothing, I am going now to the showers, see you at the exit.” I said as I run as fast as I can into the showers, I close the door of the cabinet and open the cold water, yeah, it was definitely a cold shower what I was going to take in that moment. I showered and got dressed really fast, I walked to the exit and waited for Ali to come out.

“Did you wait too much?” She asked again as she arrived next to me, I just shook my head and we both walked out of the place and to my motorcycle; I immediately gave her the other helmet I had.

We rode all the way back to her house, and my mind kept running a thousand miles per second, I really needed to talk to somebody about this, about what I am feeling. I smile as every memory of today, of the week before, and back to the moment I met Ali. The first time I saw her beautiful smile and her big brown eyes. I try to go back to the moment I started falling for her. When we finally reached her apartment, her brother or at least a guy who looked exactly like the guy in the Carnival of cultures photo, was waiting for her at the entrance of the building.

“Oh my god, Ali! Sorry I forgot about picking you up again!” He apologized and after she took out the helmet, he hugged her and then looked back at me; I was still using my helmet, so I proceed to took it out. He looked at me with surprise and then he started smiling. “Oh, now I get it.” He said with a small smile. “Hello, my name is Kyle and thank you for driving my sister back home.” He told me as he offered me his hand.

“I am Ashlyn, nice to meet you.” I introduce myself before he started heading back to the building, he whispered something to Ali, but I couldn’t listen. “Your brother seems nice.” I said looking back at Ali, she just smiles and I am just starting to love her.

“He is…” She said with a little smile. “So what about that dinner you own me?” She asks and my heart races, I do own her a dinner, I still got excuses to see her soon.

“Friday night is ok for you?” I boldly ask, and she just smiles and nods.

“Sure, see you on Friday then.” She said before she started walking towards the building.

“Don’t miss me too much.” Yes, don’t miss me too much, because I already miss you for the two of us. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mistakes are mine, thanks for the comments, hope I update soon after this ;)


	7. Love is when you trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: there is a small mention of 'rape', domestic violence and assault if you don't want to read it because it could trigger something... 
> 
> Also: I know in the USA is not common to live in your parents house when you study university but since the original story is based on an italian book and spanish movie, in these places (specially spain) is normal and common to continue living home when you study university if you live near the campus.

I drove to the cemetery, just a few hours before picking Ali up. I stand in front of the entrance of it and take a deep breath, is now or never I told to myself as I start walking towards the graves, I started walking slower and slower until I reach the row of graves I didn’t want to reach. It feels so lonely and I feel so much pain just by standing there after four years of running away from this. She was more than just my best friend, she was my sister, and she was the best that could have happen to me the time I felt nothing could be okay.

I walked slowly towards the specific grave and I saw her name. I hold my tears as hard as I could and I sat next to the stone carefully made, like everybody else’s surrounding me. I let myself fall next to it, I felt my body hitting the cold and wet grass that was there and I looked up to the sky. I felt my tears coming down my face again and again, I was silently crying.

“Hello Hope” I said to the air, hoping she will hear me wherever she is; maybe she was right now next to me, or looking from above and laughing about how stupid I look talking to the air. “I know what you think, so shut up” I spoke again with a little smile on my face and then looked down to the grass.

“I am back…” I said and felt the silence surrounding the place. “I remembered when you told me your stupid theory about the summer camp syndrome.” I smile at the memory. “You know that one where you go to a summer camp and have the time of your life, then you wait all the year but when you come back to the camp everything is changed… and you feel like an outsider.” I summarized it, and felt a little stupid when I remembered the fact that I was talking to the air.

“Christen is not the same, Kelley is not as loud as she used to be, the gang, they all sell their bikes and started a different life. And I… It’s been like two weeks since the last time I went out after working… okay let’s start with the fact that I am working with my brother in the fancy company he is working now. Totally not me.” I continue telling my history, I talked about my life in Germany, the old lady in the plane who was scared of flying and I told her my story to keep her distracted during the flight.

“And I met a girl…” I suddenly said just when I was talking about my first day back in town. “Her name is Ali… Ali Krieger” I start smiling and looked down at the grass. “I bet she is the only one who can use that name and doesn’t make you laugh.” I start laughing remembering all the times I called her ‘warrior-princess’ just to make fun of her name. “What kind of name is that?” I asked looking at the sky and then again, I waited for a couple of minutes, feeling the silence and the calm of the place.

“It’s the name of somebody who does everything she wants without a logic explanation, she is passionate about what she likes, and she is an amazing human being.” I said again, way more serious than before. “I bet you would like her, I wish you could meet her.” I smile at the thought of it, maybe, if there is a heaven. I think very carefully my next words.

“And I want her.” I start laughing again with a smile on my face. “But not just in that way.” I said laughing and shaking my head imagining what this chat would be if Hope was here. “I want to know everything about her, I want to see her face every single day of my life, I want to listen about her fears and her dreams, I just… Want her.” I made a little smile. “And I love the fact that I want her.” I finished my speech with that and stand up from the grass.

“Okay, see you later weirdo.” I said a proper goodbye, I have never felt this good since the time I went out of jail. “Promise I will visit more often.” I run towards the exit of the cemetery and to my bike. I started driving towards Ali’s place, for some weird reason, for me, this was like our first date.

I finally arrived to the building, I took a deep breath, I think it’s always this way, the moment you say your feelings out loud everything changes, and there is not turning back in what you said, and I just confess that I want Ali, in every single way a person could want another person. I have the weight of my past, of my sins, of my doubts, and all I can say is, I am afraid I can give her what she deserves, because she deserves it.

“Oh hi, you are here” A known voice says just when I took off my helmet, Kyle is standing in front of me with a Walmart bag. “I guess you are the friend Ali is going out with.” He says again and smiles at me.

“Hi Kyle, yes I am.” I respond with a smile and then took out the other helmet out. “Can you tell her I am waiting for her here?”

“Don’t you want to come in? I can show you our photo collection!” He said excited as he invited me in, I took the invitation and followed him all the way up to their apartment. When we arrived, he left the bag in the kitchen table and went back to where I was. “Over here we have our little gallery” he said as we moved to the room I’ve already seen, but I bet he didn’t know about it.

“Cool! Carnival of cultures Berlin” I said again when I looked at the photo, it was really beautiful, and once again, it was something in it that just kept my attention, something that made me look over and over again at it.

“That’s Ali’s favorite!” Kyle said with a smile, then he stood next to me “But don’t look at it that much or you are going to make her nervous.”

“Come on, it’s awesome!” I said again as I hear him laugh.

“Sometimes I think you don’t get the mystery behind me.” He said while he laughed, I tried to look closely to the photo, but it was impossible for me to figure out what was he talking about.

“Kyle if Ashlyn comes could you tell h…” Ali just arrived inside the room and when I turned around my world stopped, I know, I have seen her a dozen of times, but right now, there is something different, there is something real, there is something I can’t exactly point out, but my heart started beating fast and I can’t stop looking at her. “Oh, never mind.” She said when she saw me and then moved back to her room. “I’ll be out in a minute Ash!” She shouted and I just smiled.

\---

We arrived at the restaurant just in time, and sat on one of the tables, just when we took seat she asked for the appetizer without taking a look at the menu, anyway it sounded like she have already tasted it. She smiled when she looked back at me and all I could think about was how beautiful she looked when she smiled, when she breaths. “You don’t even look at the menu” I said with a little smile.

“First week we arrived here, Kyle and I went to all the restaurant and just order the entrees, it was fun, and here they have one of the best I tasted.” She confess with a smile before she started looking at the menu.

“Let’s do it.” I said suddenly and she looked back at me with a raised eyebrow. “Let’s do it, just take the starter and then move somewhere else.” I stated again with a smile while looking at her, god, this woman… she is beautiful even when she is just sitting there, in front of me.

“Maybe other day Ashlyn, I already choose what I am going to ask for main.” She said with a smile and kept looking at the menu.

“So, you are saying we are going out again someday?” I asked with hope, maybe with too much hope, the answer I already had it in my head, I want her, and I am going to do whatever it takes to stick with her for a long time.

“Maybe…” She smiled and then looked up, the waitress was already there with the appetitive and ready to take our order, since I just looked at her instead of choosing the meal I was going to have, I just stared at her, so when he asked me I just ordered the same Ali asked for, and the waitress left. “So... ordering the same?” She asked with a raised eyebrow. “I could have bad taste you know?”

“Not a chance.” _You are way too perfect._ I thought, I don’t even know why everything was so different with her, I can’t even make one of my classical moves to woo because I was too shy about it, let’s start with the fact I feel shy wherever I am with her.

“You sound so convinced.” She smiled and then started folding the napkin in a weird way. After a few minutes she showed me the thing she just did, it looked like a rose. “This is the only thing I can do, not trying to impress but is my way of saying I took some cooking classes, so my tastes are good.”

“So are mine.” I said and she just looked down and unfolded the napkin. Cooking classes? Is possible to found somebody as perfect as her?

“And how does our graffiti looks? I barely go that way.” She asked a little shy, maybe she thought she touched a delicate subject, and it is, but for some reason I feel I can trust her.

“Nice! It’s there looking awesome.” I answered before the waitress came with our plates and we started eating.

“So what’s the story?” She asked again after we ordered our desserts, she had a serious look on her face, like if she was really concerned about me. I couldn’t lie to her.

“It’s long…” I said and started looking everywhere but her eyes. “I mean… you know part of it” But I really didn’t want her to know the rest of it, maybe she will run away once she find out more about myself. But I also thought it was selfish and a mistake lying to her about whom I really was. At the end I don’t know what is better.

“You look so hurt when you think about it… I am just worried.” She confessed and my heart started beating faster, I had to tell her, I can’t lie to somebody like her, and deep down I know I can trust her. I can trust her with my life.

“If I told you everything and you don’t want to talk to me or see me anymore, please, just go away and don’t say goodbye.” I said as I looked right to her, my eyes looking at hers, and she just nodded.

“I promise.”

“It was my first year at university and I used to stay late in college, you know, doing homework and hanging out with friends, I also practiced box in the gym there, so I always arrived last at my home. But one day my class was canceled because a professor was in some congress and I decided going back early, you know, to sleep and have some rest just for one day.” I took a deep breath knowing what was next. “When I arrived… my mom was with the neighbor having sex in the room she shared with my dad, but I always thought that guy was stalking my mom, telling her some dirty things, you know? My mind went immediately to think he was raping her. And I felt my blood boiling, I just started hitting him, I punched, I kick, I didn’t stopped even when I heard his bones cracking, when some of his teeth went out of his mouth, when he stopped moving.”

I looked up, and Ali was looking at me with a shocked look on her face, but I needed to continue, I needed to finish the story. “The police officer came and arrested me, first thinking it was domestic violence against my father, when he find out he was the neighbor the charges were for assault. In court I was hoping my mom will support my speculation, but I was wrong, she was cheating on my dad with him, and I just hated him and her more, I exploded in the court and of course I was convicted.” I looked up again and she was looking right at my eyes, serious, maybe she was judging me.

“I am not judging you.” She said just like if she read my mind. “What happened next?”

“I was convicted for two years, in jail I met Hope, she was convicted because she used to go to fancy or charity parties and stole all the jewelry she can.” I smiled remembering the time she told me why was she there.  “We became best friends, and when we were both free she gave me as a present her old motorcycle, because she bought a new one with the money of the last jewels she stole” I said with a little laugh. “My brother was living in this part of the state so I moved here with Hope. We made our money running illegal races past midnight, once I was stuck in a traffic jam in the uptown part of the city and there is where I met her…” I told the same story, the traffic jam, the party, the pool, the illegal races, the fights, the graffiti, my friends stealing things at her house, the race I decided not to run. “And the girl who was driving the other motorcycle decided it was easier to kill Hope than to let her win back the ring… so she died.” I said with tears in my eyes. “I decided to run away as far and fast as I could, without saying goodbye, I went to Germany to finish university and to work.”

“Are you the same woman of six years ago?” She asked serious, looking right into my eyes, I felt helpless, and like I just ruined everything.

“I am trying not to be.”

“Then, there is no reason to walk away from you.” She said with a smile on her face, and right there and then I started falling hard, and deep for her.

After paying the bill I drove her back, I took the extra-long way, so I can enjoy her presence, her touch on my body, her little sounds of excitement whenever I drove boldly. I loved every second of it, because something deep down inside of me was telling me she was going away… and I was just starting to love her.

“So, back in your castle warrior princess” I said with a smile, she jumped off my motorcycle and looked back at me.

“Tomorrow, Kyle and I are going to the beach, the real beach” she said with a big smile on her face, and my heart beat faster than ever when I anticipated what was coming next… “Do you want to come with us? You can also invite Kelley if you want.” I think is so cliché to say in that moment the world seemed like the most beautiful place I’ve ever been, but it was, she was not running away, she was staying in my life.

“I will be here first thing in the morning.” She smiled as she handled me back my helmet and she started walking to the door, but before she entered the building, before I started my motorcycle, she came back to where I was. When I turned back to see her, I felt her lips on mine… and my world stopped.  Fireworks in my head, butterflies in my stomach, my heart beating so hard I felt it was going out to get out of my chest. It was the best kiss I’ve ever had and it only lasted a few seconds. When I opened my eyes, she was smiling at me and then she just gave me a quick peck on my lips.

“Goodnight Ashlyn Harris.”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it and thank you for your comments they're well appreciated.   
> Sorry if it took time, too much to do and so litte time u_u


	8. Love is crazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally I got time to write!!! (that and that one of my teachers went to a congress abroad so we didn't have class) anyway...  
> the song is a traduction of Clara Lago "La cama" (the bed) a song made for the movie this story is based on: "Tengo ganas de ti"

I arrived as soon as I could, Kelley was next to me in the car, today I am driving them to the beach and back, it’s the least I could do for the girl who just stole my heart. I was a little nervous, after the kiss we shared the night before, but I was also eager, to see her again, to hug her, to kiss her again. Kelley noticed my nervousness and started smiling and mocking me with it, I just told her to shut up as we waited for them to come down.

“Wow, you just love stealing cars right?” My favorite voice said as I turned around to see her, I jumped out of my car and helped her with her things, as I was putting her stuff in the trunk Kyle arrived and introduced himself to Kelley, or that is what I supposed since I was lost in the sight of the girl standing next to me.

“Your brother is talking to Kelley?” I asked as soon as I saw both of them talking like they were lifelong friends, I smiled, I was happy Ali and her family get along pretty well and pretty easy with my old friends, it was nice and I love every second of the time I spend with both of them, I guess we should do it more.

“Yeah, I guess, he always charm his way into people’s lives. It’s cute to see.” She said as she started walking towards the front of the car.

“Well he is not the only one.” I declared as I run back to the front seat and started the car. I took the high way, and I can’t help but smile at the thought of seeing that graffiti again, I looked up to the bridge and there it was, the beach we painted.

“Whoa! A, the way you covered up the graffiti is a total win” Kelley said as she looked at the bridge, amazed by the view. “Hope always told me that you should do street art instead of random graffiti.” Kelley said and I just smiled, remembering the time when Ali told me something pretty similar.

“I’ve never get why you want people to call you A” Kyle said and I just looked at him, well I wasn’t sure if the conversation her sister and I had the night previous was part of his knowledge, but anyway, if I am going to be a part of Ali’s life, I am sure had to be sincere with them.

“No particular reason, people in prison started calling me that.” Actually, it was Hope the one who started calling me just A, like the beginning of my name, she also said she always thought there was a mystery behind the beginning of the alphabet and I was the human representation of it; she always made me laugh with that.

“And since she is being all open up about shit like this, why did you go to Germany? Why not just the other side of the country or Canada? Why Germany? I mean you didn’t even knew German” Kelley asked genuinely concerned, I know I left without saying goodbye, but I also gave no explanations why I went to Germany, anyway it was a stupid reason without a solid argument.

“Hope once said we should leave to Germany when we get out of jail.” I said laughing, “She told me once she made a trip there with the money of one of the jewels she stole” I smiled remembering how funny her way of telling stories was every time she talked about her past, like if she was over it, I am sure she was, indeed, over it, unlike me.

“I always wondered if she was a kleptomaniac, I mean, we met when she was trying to steal my wallet.” Kelley said laughing, actually, I also thought about it too once or twice after we got released from jail, because she started winning a lot of cash with the illegal races but she still stole wallets in the uptown teenage parties.   

“Yeah, she was weird man.” I said with a laugh and then looked back at Kyle and Ali who were looking at Kelley and me like if we were crazy. “I wish you could meet her, I bet she would like you.” I said with a little smile, Ali just smiled back and Kyle looked at the highway.

“God, look at the landscape Ali, lucky me I brought my camera!” He suddenly said and took out the object, and started taking photos of the landscape, I found funny how both of them were so passionate about photography, and my heart melted when I heard Ali giving him advices on how to take something. “My camera, my photos. Alexandra!” He shouted and we all laughed… its ok to say I’ve never have that much fun with a group of people in a highway?

We had so much fun at the beach, we played, we jumped, we threw Kyle into the water when he started throwing at us some sand, we laugh all the way back from the beach, it’s been ages since the last time I had so much fun, but I don’t care anyway, I am happy right now. And Ali… there is no single day I do not fall more in love with her.

I drove Kelley back to her house, and then I parked out of Ali and Kyle’s apartment. I was just nervous I wanted to ask Ali out tonight, to do something, to just hang out, to be by her side and stare at her eyes, I just want her…

“So, I am living you two alone.” Kyle said with a little smile as he ran to the door and then into the building.

“Thanks for coming and for bringing Kelley, I had so much fun.” She said as she stared at the floor, I wanted to see her eyes, so, with my hand I touched her cheek, and the moment she looked up I got lost in her eyes, those beautiful brown eyes.

 I did the only reasonable thing I thought I could do, I kissed her, like I’ve never kissed someone before, I put my soul into that kiss, I want to get lost, if our history is going to be a short one, like the one I had before, I just wanted to live every second of it, I wanted to feel everything, I want to taste everything, I want to read every coma and every point, every word… I wanted to live this love just the way a few people do:  like crazy.

“Woah…” It looks like that’s the only thing I could get out of my mouth when my lips left hers, I opened my eyes and she still got her eyes closed, she looked so beautiful, and when she opened her eyes there are three things I could say about her: I love her eyes, I love her lips, and I am crazy about her.

“I could say the same Ashlyn Harris.” She said with a shy smile, and it’s like fire, that slowly burns everything, slowly, just touching her face and the feel of my body burning up when I kissed her again, when you realize you have found something when you stopped searching for it, when you ignore the instructions your brain is giving to you, I don’t know… everything it’s crazy, you know? Just… crazy.

“Let’s go and have dinner, let’s go and just eat the appetizers, let’s do it today.” I suddenly said, I needed to, It was way too early for me to just stop looking at her, it was just too soon to let her go inside that house and not seeing her again until tomorrow, it was way too much time.

“You are crazy…” she said with a little smile, but she jumps back inside the car anyway, and I just rush to reach my seat and start it.

We eat every single appetizer the restaurants in town had, we laughed like we’ve never laughed before, sometimes if I was lucky enough she kissed me, and every time she kisses me, all the demons hunting my head, all the memories of my past, all the sins I committed, just shut down for a couple of seconds. Her eyes tell me there are a hundred summers yet to live and to enjoy, and if I ever waste one, just by looking at her all is fixed.

Our last stop was a small cafeteria, when we went inside there was a girl playing the guitar, Ali smiled and stared at her for a couple of minutes until the girl finished her song. “Hey, did you know I used to sing in a cafeteria when I was in high school back in D.C.?”  

“No, do you have any good songs you still know?”

“Something better, wait…” She said with a smile as she approached the girl. “Excuse me? Can I have your guitar just a few minutes?” she asked and the girl let her took it, Ali sit down in the chair the girl was sitting in and look at the audience. “Well, hi, my name is Alexandra and I am going to sing something I wrote a few months ago.” She confessed as she started playing the chords…

“This week I thought about kidnapping you,

Then I looked at your photos when I went to sleep

I want to know who you are and what happened to you

I want you to know me and fall in love with me

Every night I fall asleep searching you in my bed

You are never there but tomorrow you will never forget about me

I will be your nightmare day and night until you say ‘you are my life’

Don’t say no if you haven’t been here.

You’ve never thought I will keep you in my house

I never thought I could do that to you.

But that was the only way to make you fall for me

So the story doesn’t repeat again.

Every night I fall asleep searching you in my bed

You are never there but tomorrow you will never forget about me

I will be your nightmare day and night until you say ‘you are my life’

Don’t say no if you haven’t been here.

Every night I fall asleep searching you in my bed

You are never there but tomorrow you will never forget about me”

She finished her song and walked towards me, she was smiling and all I could do was look at her. When she was finally close enough I just hugged her. “That was amazing warrior princess.” I said with a little smile and then I started laughing when she gave me a little punch in my arm and then hugged me again. We left the cafeteria driving towards her apartment.

I followed her inside her building, she told me to, we took the elevator to the last floor of it, and then she told me to follow her up to the roof, when we arrived there she was sitting on the edge and I ran towards her, but I stopped just when I could see the city, all light up by the small houses, the tall buildings, the parks, the street lights.

“Beautiful isn’t it? I love here” She said as she just looked back to the city, I sat next to her and stared at her, the lights of the city gave her an angelical look, just when I thought I couldn’t found her more beautiful, there I was, staring at her like if it was the first time.

“I think I am looking at the most beautiful thing in this world.” I confess, looking at her, and she just started smiling.

“Stop with that, this could be forever, no turning back, you know?” She told me with a smile, and I just think carefully about what I am going to tell her.

“What if I want this to be forever?”

“You are crazy” She said again with a smile.

“For you…” I confess with a smile on my face “I am crazy for you and today… I want you.” I said as I approached her to kiss her, the moment our lips touch I lost sense of time, I don’t know how much it passed before the first time we stopped to take some air, the only thing I know is that we started again, it started raining, and she put her legs around my waist as we continue kissing, there, in the top of the world, like two crazy people, two crazy people falling in love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's like 3 or maybe 4 chapters left and I hope I update soon!


	9. Love is when you give

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Early update! Mistakes are mine.

I woke up when the sun entered the room, flashbacks of what we did the night before came rushing into my mind, and I just smiled at the thought of it. I searched for her on the bed, to finally find out it was empty. I looked around, continuing my mission to find her face, to see her smile, but she was nowhere to be seen. I stood up from the bed and put on some of my clothes that were all over the room.

“Oh my god, you are here!” I heard Kyle screaming the moment I went out of the room, I jumped and almost hit my foot in the chair that was next to me.

“Kyle!” I said with a smile as I continue with my search.

“She was late for work this morning; it was really funny how she barely managed to get dressed.” Kyle told me when he realized why I was acting like a lost puppy in a new environment. But his information just reminded me I had also to go to work.

“Shit! Work!” I said as I run back to the room to finish dressing myself up and taking my stuff, a really difficult search since last night the only thing I remember is what happened between Ali and me. I rushed out saying goodbye to Kyle as I run out to get into the car and then to my home to change it for my motorcycle.

After work I drove as fast as I could to the gym, I had a weird urge to see her again, this was so different to every relationship I’ve ever had, as soon as I arrived I quickly changed inside the dressing rooms and run to the box ring, and when I finally reached the area I saw her, and she just stole my breath away, I thought that after a night with her my obsession will be filled, but now I just want more of her.

“I didn’t knew you were the kind of girl who lives in the morning without saying goodbye” I said as I wrapped her from behind, I was looking at her, literally adoring her, she looked so beautiful and also so hot in that short and sleeveless shirt.

“You look so cute when you sleep, I just didn’t have the heart to wake you up.” She said with a smile on her face as she looked at me, I think she just had a new light on her eyes, and I guess I had the same kind, we were both falling in love.

“So… I was wondering if I could take you out to diner today, and tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, and so on.” I boldly said with a smile as I spin her around in order to make her look at me, she smiled and gave me a quick peck on the lips… a little taste of my new addiction: her lips.

“What if I make you something to eat back at my place? I mean it will be nothing too complicated since my work schedule finish really late.” She said with a smile as she turned around and said something to the girl that was doing some warming up exercises.  I smiled, I could get used to this, I want to get used to this, and I want her. “Why you keep looking at me like that?” She said with a shy smile as she looked down to her feet.

“I don’t know… you take my breath away.” I confessed to her, and I saw how her face turned bright red: cute.

“I bet you said that to all your conquest Ashlyn Harris.” She told me with a small smile as she was trying so hard to avoid my gaze.

“No…only to you.” I confessed again, actually I think she is the first girl in my entire life I’ve ever told her my thoughts about her out loud.

“You think your lines will work with me?” She said with a small smile and a raised eyebrow, I shook my head as I approached her and took her face in my hands and kissed her hard, with all the want I have, tasting my personal drug, my personal addiction.

“They are not lines; you are really the only one who takes my breath away.” I was going to kiss her again, but I remembered we were at her work and I was just a client who paid an expensive membership just to look at a personal trainer and sometimes play along with her at the box ring. “Maybe I should go, do some exercise and wait until you finish this” I said moving my hand in circles to make clear I was talking about the place “So we could finish this” I pointed between her and I as I pecked her lips again, turned around and started running to the cardio area.

It was like that, all the week, and then it became almost like a daily routine for a month. I went to work in the mornings, then to the gym where she worked and then I returned back to her apartment, sometimes she let me invite her dinner, on her free days we went out with alone, sometimes with Kelley and her brother, we finished all our nights on her bed, we started all our days looking at each other eyes, smiling like idiots. I was falling in love, what else could I say?

\-------

It’s been two months since Ali and I officially started dating, and I was extremely happy, but that day, I made a decision, I want her, and I want to spend the rest of my days with her. I mean I wasn’t thinking too far… Like I am not trying to say I was going to marry her right there and then, but I was going to do something I’ve been thinking since the first time she kissed me. And that thing I was going to do was something I’ve never done it before, with anyone.

“So, could you tell me what this big surprise you have for me is?” She said as she was putting on her helmet, I smiled at her, I’ve been thinking about this for so long…her impatience was nothing compared to what I was thinking.

“Be patient my warrior princess, it’s a surprise.” I said as I started the motorcycle and drive to the highway in direction to the beach.

When we finally arrived there I just continue driving all the way next to the shore, as far as I could get and as fast as I could go, I wanted this to be perfect to I needed to find the perfect place, the perfect path to follow, the perfect situation just to tell her what the surprise is about. And I just want to capture the moment I see her face in my mind forever.

“Okay, if you wanted to kill me somewhere my brother will not find my body, I guess you choose wisely.” She said with confusion on her face as she looked around, trying to figure out where we were. I took her helmet off her hands and I put it next to mine on the sand. “Now I am seriously thinking you are going to kill me.” She said again as I just looked at her, I must admit, I was not just afraid, I was terrified.

“You are sitting too far.” I told her with a serious tone on my voice. She looked at me with a questioning look and I just cleared my voice. “You are sitting too far from the handlebars.” I said again and looked at her with a smile. The look on her face took my breath away. Her eyes were wide open, her mouth was parted in surprise and her eyes light up. Then she smiled and excitedly moved to the pilot part of the seat and I sat in the back.

“Are you serious?” She asked, turning her face to look at me with a big smile, before she kissed the corner of my mouth. “This is the best surprise ever!” She screamed excited and I just fall in love with her even more.

“Don’t get too excited or I might regret this.” I smiled when she looked at me again, just to make sure I was joking.

“Why are you saying that?” She asked again, and my heart started beating faster…

“You are the first one I let ride it.” I confess with a serious face and look, as our position allowed, right into her eyes. She smiled again and turned around to face the road. “First, put the key in the ON position.” She did it and I took a deep breath, I grabbed her left hand with mine and put it on the handler. “Move it to neutral.” I said again and she followed my order. “Now, the kill switch, move it to start.” She did it again and I took another deep breath. “Press the clutch and the starter button.” I told her, and I felt the motorcycle starting, she made a weird excited noise and I just start laughing. “God we are not moving yet and here you are excited as ever.”

“Shut up Ashlyn!” She screamed at me as I moved her hand with mine, just to teach her how to make the bike start moving. “Okay we are actually moving.” She said excited.

“Yeah but do not move too fast or you are going to kill us.” I said with a smile as I wrap my arms around her waist and rested my head in her back. She was driving slowly, like a little kid who was just starting to learn how to ride a bike, like a teenager on her first driving lessons.

“Am I doing ok?” She asked after a few minutes, for someone like me who drives pretty fast, she was doing it extremely slow, but I understood her, this was her first time, and so far, she was doing pretty well.

“Well, for a beginner, you are doing it great!” I said with a smile as I grabbed her hands in mine as I start to accelerate, she tensed up and I smiled at her reaction. “Don’t be scared; just let her take you to wherever you want.” I told her as I accelerated even more before I let her drive it on her own again.

We ride for about an hour before I helped her with the turning back, she looked at me and I just smiled at her. “Lesson is finished Ashlyn Harris?” She asked again, how wrong she was, I was going to do something but I needed her to be sure and confident while she was driving. I looked at her and shook my head.

“I need you to accelerate, as fast as you can, and you have to keep a straight line, could you do that?” I asked her and she looked at me with a questioning look. “You only need to drive fast and on a straight line, could you do that?” I asked again and she just looked at me surprised before I smiled at her. “I trust you can do it.” I confess and she just smiled. “Just remember to keep a straight line and drive fast, really fast.”

“Like this?” She said after a few minutes, I told her to go faster and faster, until I started feeling we reached the maximum velocity of the vehicle I stopped holding her and put my hands behind me.

“Do not stop, and keep the straight line.” I said as I started standing up, she started screaming something about the fact that I am crazy, but it’s been years since the last time I did this and I also started screaming in excitement, I felt the air hitting my body, trying to took me down, I screamed again. “Ali!”

“Get down idiot!” She said almost in panic, I laughed and screamed her name again. “You are going to fall!” She screamed again and I continued laughing.

“Ali!”

“What?!”

“I WANT YOU!” I screamed at the top of my lungs, smiling and then taking some air in order to scream again. “ALEXANDRA! TODAY I WANT YOU!”

“You are crazy.” She said the moment she felt I sat down and wrapped my arms around her waist. “Totally crazy.”

“Only for you.” I confess again as I rested my head on her back and let her lead us back to where we left the helmets. And then I let her ride back to her apartment. We made like twice the time because she started driving slowly when we reached the highway. “Finally! I thought we will never reach your home princess!” I said as I walked with her towards her door.

“I wasn’t that slow!” She said with a big smile, and I just kissed her, I kissed her like I’ve never kissed someone, I kissed her wanting to make her feel what I wanted to tell her, because right there and then I was sure I loved her. “Whoa! See you tomorrow good kisser Ashlyn Harris.” She said with a smile before opening the door of the building.

“See you tomorrow Ali.” I told her with a smile as I ran back to my motorcycle.

I drove back to my apartment, I don’t know why I didn’t stayed with her that night, but that decision changed everything. When I arrived to the street of my brother’s house there she was…

“So it is true, the famous A is back.” A blonde girl riding a green Kawasaki ninja 300 was standing there, near the entrance of my building, smiling like an idiot when I saw what she was holding next to her. Hope’s motorcycle, her Suzuki GSXR 600.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2 chapters to go and this is over folks!


	10. And I love you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter,mistakes are mine

“What are you doing here?” I asked as I parked and walked towards her, looking at Hope’s motorcycle. 

“Coming to say hello A. I can’t?” She asked with a little smile and then looked back at Hope’s bike. “I always loved it, anyway, you own me a race A.” She said and started laughing when I shook my head no. “So now you don’t talk?”

“Piss off.” I told her and then moved back to my motorcycle so I can finally reach my house and end this unpleasant chat.

“So you are not saying hello to your old friends?” She said again as she jumped out of her motorcycle and moved towards me with the other one. “You own me a race, I own you a ring, but since I lost it four years ago in that stupid race I will give your best friends motorcycle.” She told me as she handled me the vehicle, I looked at her with my eyes wide open.

“I don’t want anything coming from you Lori.” I told her with a firm voice as I moved again trying to get out of the situation.

“Once a racer, always a racer.” She stated as she moved in front of me. “Come on, avenge your friend, take this…” She said as she pointed to the motorcycle and smiled. “As your price, actually I am hoping you ride this today, at midnight, against me.” She let the motorcycle go and I save it from falling, the moment I touch it, she ran back to her motorcycle. “I’ll wait you in the same place, if you don’t come I will report you stole that motorcycle, and with your history, I bet you are going to end up in jail as soon as they hear your name.” She smiled and started her motorcycle. “If you win today, I’ll let you keep it.” She finished her speech with that and started driving.

“Don’t do it.” I heard a familiar voice behind me, I turned around and I saw Kelley with tears in her eyes. “Don’t, please A, don’t.” She said as she walked towards me.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, surprised she was here as I hugged her and rested my chin on her head.

“I came to invite you to hang out with the gang, please, A, don’t do it.” She said once again as she cried out, I looked at Hope’s motorcycle, next to us, almost untouched, I didn’t saw the accident but I heard the vehicle just needed a change of a few pieces I supposed Lori did change. And in that moment, I lost all the capacity of reasonable thinking.

“I need to do this.” I said as I moved in front of Hope’s motorcycle. “This will be the last time I do this.” I said as I started the vehicle and looked at Kelley who was just looking at me with her eyes as open as they could be. My sudden thirst of revenge wasn’t helping with her pain look, I knew her tears were my fault, I knew this whole thing was my fault.

“Don’t.” She said, firmly, but not enough to make me regret my stupid and bold decision. So I just ignored her, and drove as fast as I could with Hope’s bike.

\---

The race was difficult, racing again was difficult, but I managed to keep it up the entire race. A few old friends who were still racing were cheering me the whole time and that just made me feel like I was twenty again, like those four years away from here never happened. They made me feel like the moment I reach the goal Hope will be there, happy we made good money thanks to our talent.

But reality hits me like a brick when I reached the end line and what I just saw was a bunch of strangers cheering me, I turn around just to see Lori arriving and looking at me with a big smile, I knew right there and then… she was drunk.

“So the legend A is also back.” She shouted as she walked towards me. “The uptown criminal girl, just like your friend Hope, oh sorry I forgot, you no longer have friends because she is dead.” She said and she started laughing in my face. “You want to hear her last words?” She whispered next to my ear as I stood there, trying to control the anger filling my body.

“Leave me alone Lori.” I said as I tried to turn around, but she just held me and commanded her friends to surround us.

“You really don’t want to hear her last words?” She smiled as I tried to free myself, but she was strong, and by her smell I also could say she was really, really drunk. I shook my head no and she just started laughing. “Well then, anyway I am telling you this one truth…” She took a step closer, and I wanted to move back but for some weird reason I just stayed there. She whispered next to my ears the words that made me lose my mind. “I killed her on purpose.”

I something in me just explode, just like the time I found my mom with the neighbor, I took her by her shirt and punched in the face, I saw how she made a few steps back before smiling as she hit me in the stomach, I immediately recovered and hit her face with my knee. Her nose started bleeding as she tried to punch me, but I managed to avoid all her attempts to hurt me. I attacked back and punched her again, and again, and again, until I saw her falling on the ground.  I was on top of her, punching her as hard as I could, as everybody keep shouting nonsense. Until I felt someone tried to separate us, and I hit him with my elbow… then I heard her voice.

“¡Ashlyn!” She screamed and I immediately turned around to see her, my favorite person in the world, Ali Krieger. I stood up as fast as I could when I saw the tears in her eyes, Lori started to move in order to get up and I was just denying with my head, all the things my mind was thinking were the facts I told her I wasn’t that woman, I promised I will never be that woman again, and I failed, miserably.

“Ali…” I managed to say, but then I saw how she ran next to the man in the ground, her brother, Kyle, I just hit her brother trying to free me and left him with a bleeding nose. I panicked. I wanted to run away, so I did the next logic thing to do, I took Hope’s motorcycle and drove. I drove as fast as I could, and I saw it, the lake, I accelerated as fast as I could and I felt the motorcycle falling, I felt myself falling, until my body hit the water…

I swam and went out of the lake, I was crying inside. I thought I changed, but I just pretend I did. I was the same from five years ago.

“Ashlyn…” I heard her said minutes after I went out of the lake, my favorite voice, my everything.

“Ali…” I said and looked at her, she was also crying. “I am sorry.”  That is the only thing I managed to say as she approached me. 

“Sorry is not enough this time Ashlyn.” She said, serious, almost cold. “I don’t want to wake up again in the middle of the night just to hear you are here.” She confessed, as she touched my arm with her hand, I looked up and find her looking at me. “I also don’t want to see you like I saw you today, covered in that girls blood, not even listening to what we were screaming at you.” She started shaking. “I don’t want to know if you end up in jail because you just started hitting somebody.”

“I am sorry, I am really sorry, please tell Kyle I am so, so sorry.” I said again, now I was also crying, I knew what was next, I could feel it, and I didn’t want that.

“Kyle knows, we tried to understand you.” She said with a small smile. “And we are no one to judge…” Her voice broke and she started shaking. “But I don’t want you near me and my brother.” And that, that was the first time in my life my heart broke, I loved her, and I could not imagine my life without her, not now, not ever.

“I love you.” I said, desperately, stupid… in the worst moments of all I just managed to finally say those words I’ve never felt as true as that precise moment. I loved her, deeply, madly.

“I love you too.” She said with a little smile, my heart started beating faster, but I wasn’t happy. I knew what was coming from the moment I realized what I did after the race. “I think I love you like I’ve never loved before and that is the reason why I can’t be with you, not like this.” She said, touching my face with her hand. “I can’t be with you knowing that someday you will end up arrested or dead. I can’t Ashlyn Harris.” She smiled at me and boldly gave me a kiss on my cheek. “Goodbye A.”

“Tell me this is not the end.” I once again sounded desperate, I was desperate. I needed to know I had another chance, one day, when I change, I could wait. I will wait. I was crying and by the small move her shoulders made after I spoke I could tell she was also crying. She started walking again and I watched her go away. “I love you Alexandra, I love you.” I screamed I needed to know I had another chance; this could not be the end.

_Dear Ali_

_Here I am, writing a letter with all my feelings for you, just like you taught me. I want to tell you all the things I couldn’t tell you before. Here, in this letter you will never read, because I will never send it to you, I will burn it so my feelings will go away. That is what you promised the first time you tell me to write a letter, right? First I want to be clear; I screwed up with you, big. I wanted to move on but at the end there was always something holding me back. What a foolish thing to do, not forgiving other people, not forgiving myself, staying in the darkness of my mind, haunted by my sins and my demons. I wasn’t good enough for you. I was blind and it’s difficult, trying to see the things clearly when it’s distorted enough. I don’t want my past, or my future, just the things to happen. Yes? No? Yes? No? Burn this letter? Send it to you?  Erasing our graffiti? Will you burn all those photos you took of me? Of us? Will you ever forgive me for what I did? But saying nothing is clear it’s a lie. I am sure of something:  I want you. I want all of you. And I love you. I really do._

I played with the lighter for what felt like a thousand years, but I decided against it. I sent to her the letter… And since then I prayed everyday just to see her smile again.

A month after I delivered the letter I found out she moved to D.C. with her brother.

After she left, I was devastated I am not going to lie. I continued hanging out with Kelley and the gang at the bar; I continued working and also going to the gym. Weird enough I just saw her face everywhere I went, and my dreams where surrounded by all the memories I have about us. Our graffiti was my favorite place to visit, every night I stayed there and looked at it like it was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

Later I discovered I was a good drawer when I started drawing her face in very paper I found. And the fact that I was a good searcher every time I searched for her in my bed every night. I was trying to find an excuse to go to D.C. and find her. I couldn’t go and try to find her without a reasonable reason. But I love her, isn’t that enough?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay in theory next chapter is the last one, but to be honest... I haven't reached the half part of writting it and it's already too long. So MAYBE I am dividing it in two... depends, so next chapter might be the last


	11. Today I want you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay for the ones who have watched the spanish or italian film you will notice there is a huge change in the story but the escence is the same so hope no big deal for the ones who love the movie/book "tengo ganas de ti"  
> Next chapter will be very very short and not based in the original movie/book and It will probably be done by tomorrow  
> This chapter is long and is a little similar to the first one (italic are for flashbacks and the 'normal' for Ashlyn's POV)  
> Mistakes are mine.

_“Hey kiddo, I just found your soul mate!” Hope said excited to the girl in front of her._

_“Here in jail?”_

_“Yeah, don’t judge, everybody make mistakes and she is perfect for you I am one hundred percent sure” Hope stated again as she smiled to the girl and raised her eyebrows._

_“Like stealing some jewels? Seriously Hope, I came all across the ocean just to visit you here and the first thing you said to your high school best friend is that?” The girl said again as she smiled._

_“Yeah, she is literally made for you I swear! But in other news what happened to my motorcycle?” Hope asked, concerned about the vehicle and the future of it._

_“Kyle recovered it the day we arrived; he also doesn’t let me ride it.”_

_“Well Alexandra, your father was very clear when he gave it to me.”_

\---

It’s been almost six months since the last time I saw her. I arrived to my apartment latter that night when I found it. A letter from D.C.

I didn’t need to be asked twice when the thing than came into that letter was an invitation to Alexandra and Kyle Krieger photography gallery in D.C., the first thing I did was to pack my bags and fuel my motorcycle. I also quit my job and told my brother I’ll probably stay in D.C. to live. I was decided, I was going to win her back, and I just needed that excuse to make my decision.

\---

_“Really Hope? You just gave her my father’s motorcycle?” Ali was extremely angry with her friend. “If it was not clear the motorcycle was a present to you!” She screamed again as she approached her best friend. “What is wrong with you?!”_

_“Hey! I told you, she is your soul mate, your one and done, I am sure you two will be so awesome together!” Hope said again with a smile as she was trying not to laugh at the image of Ali in front of her._

_“Hope, I live in Germany, she lives here. I am NOT a criminal and she was convicted for assault.”_

_“What if I convince her to move to Germany? And I told you, she made a honest mistake.” Hope said again as she saw Ali rolling her eyes._

_“Whatever, we will never work together. In other news tomorrow the party is in the house of a girl named Christen, second house when you enter street seven near downtown.” Ali looked at her with a serious face and gave her harmless little slaps on her cheek. “And do not steal anything Hope!” She giggled as she separated from her best friend._

_\---_

I finally arrived to D.C., after getting lost and a couple of problems trying to find a place to stay; I found a cheap motel, and I searched for the place where the photo gallery was going to be inaugurated. A big place with a lot of different temporal expositions, since the inauguration was going to be the next day after I arrived I decided to look to one of the other things that were in exhibition.

“Oh, the famous A is here!” A girl approached me as I entered one of the expositions, I immediately thought of Ali, and I started searching for her, eager to see her smile.

“She is not here A! By the way, I am one of her best friends, Heather. We met back in high school.” She said as she offered me her hand.

“It’s Ashlyn Harris for Ali’s friends.” I said with a smile, I loved the fact just her and her brother called me by my real name. “I don’t mean to be rude but how is that you know about me?” I asked and she just started laughing.

“God, you are so funny, no wonder why Ali is in love with you.” She said, laughing. But my heart skipped a beat. She still loves me? I still got a chance to be with her? “Anyway, see you tomorrow at the inauguration A.”

\---

_“At least admit she is hot!” Hope said in the middle of the party._

_“Yeah she is, and definitely interested in the girl she just threw to the pool.” Ali said as she put down her camera and looked at her friend._

_“Well maybe she is interested in her now, but who knows?” Hope said again and Ali just rolled her eyes. “Maybe destiny will bring you two together you know?”_

_“Yes and Santa Claus will bring me inspiration for Christmas so I can take good photos.” Ali smiled and shook her head as she looked down, she must admit the girl Hope insist it’s her soul mate is really hot. “Anyway, I leave to Germany tomorrow, so I am going back to the hotel and sleep so tomorrow I’ll finally be free from you and your weird ways to try and find me a girlfriend. And Hope… do not steal anything!”_

_“I will be a good kid tonight!” Hope said winking an eye at Ali, who just rolled her eyes and left the house._

\---

I arrived late, the ribbon was already cut and I mentally kicked myself, that was one of the few chances I had to see her again and try to fix this…try to fix us. I went inside the building and looked at the room where their photos were exhibited. When I entered there was in a big poster the name of the exposition, I guess at that moment I was so desperate to see Ali’s smile I didn’t look closely to the title, it didn’t ring a bell, when it was clear as the water. The name was: “The mystery behind the A.”

\---

_“Alex, come here, look! Isn’t her your soul mate?” Kyle asked the moment he saw Ashlyn went to get her luggage._

_“What are you talking abou… yeah, she is.” Ali said as she put down her camera and looked at the blonde who was now having trouble asking for a cab._

_“What is she doing here?” Kyle looked at Ali and she just raised her shoulders._

_“I don’t know, I don’t care about her, Hope is dead.” Ali snapped a photo of the blonde trying to get the taxi manager to understand her and she turned around to continue taking photos of the airport._

_“I know, she is a reminder of her also.” Kyle said with a small smile._

_\---_

When I arrived at the first part, my eyes went wide: There it was, a photo of her and me when we just arrived the night I teach her how to ride my motorcycle, I was looking down at her and she was looking up at me. We both were smiling at each other as we just parked outside her apartment, of course the photo was taken by Kyle, he was also very good, but the photo is the one that made my heart beat faster, I smiled as I continued to look around, and all the photos in that room were about the two months we spend together.

\---

_“Alexandra this photo is prize material” Kyle screamed as he looked the photo of the carnival of cultures in Berlin they just took a week ago, he was admiring it when he noticed something. “Alex, come and see this!”_

_\---_

I continued to the other room, the first photo I saw stole my breath away… I knew when that photo was taken; I just didn’t know it existed. I was curled up in Ali’s bed, my eyes closed and the sheets covering my body, that photo was the morning after our first time, I was sure, that was the only time I woke up without Ali next to me, I smiled, that night, was the best one I’ve ever had in my life.

The rest of that room where the photos when we were in that transition, it was like I was walking to the very beginning of our relationship, from the times we were friends, to the time we were just strangers that happened to came across each other in this world. Her photos were really good; I chuckled when I saw the photo she took of me before she made me hide in the closet. I walked smiling to the next room.

 The photo I saw there just took my breath away, like it always did: The Carnival of cultures in Berlin. Does it sound selfish if I said at the beginning I had no idea what the photo was doing here? I mean the exposition was clearly about the relationship Ali and I shared, when I first looked at the photo the first thing that crossed my mind was the fact that maybe from here, all the photos were other works, silly me, thank god a lady next to me just made an “aww” when she read the caption.

And everything came to place, the caption was clear, but the photo wasn’t clear for me until I read it, “A in the background” it said, I searched myself in the crowd of people and there I was, looking right at the camera, but not really looking at the camera, I had a small smile on my face. It was beautiful, the best photo ever.  

\---

_“Oh my god, Kyle, look over there!” Ali said when she stopped taking photos of the places, and focused on Ashlyn who was talking with Kelley animatedly._

_“Kelley?” Kyle asked when he arrived next to Ali, but when he saw the blonde his eyes light up. “Oh my god, is she your soul mate?”_

_“She is not my soul mate, she was Hope’s friend and she got our dads motorcycle.” Ali said almost pissed off._

_“And for some weird reason she happens to appear everywhere we go! I mean the photos you have of her in the party four years ago are justifiable, but the one in the Frankfurt airport, and at the carnival? Tell me that was not some soul mates shit.”_

_“Coincidence, causality, I don’t know Kyle, shit happens.” Ali said as she started following the blonde._

_“And you are following her!”_

_“Shut up Kyle, I want to see my dad’s motorcycle again, I am sure she still has it.” Ali said as she continued following the blonde._

_“Well my dad gave it to Hope, and she gave it to her, so technically is her motorcycle.” Kyle said as he was trying to catch up with his sister walk. “You can’t appear in front of her and go all Hamlet for the motorcycle.”_

_“I am not; I am just going to take a closer look, ok?”_

_\---_

I started feeling a little excited, the photo of the carnival of cultures in Berlin just made me think about my relationship with Ali, I stood there, looking at the photo in front of me, scared to know what was behind it, why I was suddenly scared to look further in the exposition, why I was afraid to realize maybe this thing started before I even knew.

\---

_“She is a complete asshole so don’t ask Kyle!” Ali said as she entered to the apartment._

_“Yeah, I could see, that’s why you are smiling like a crazy person.”_

_“She called me warrior princess” Ali confessed with a shy smile._

_“And that is all it takes to steal Alexandra Krieger’s heart?” Kyle asked with a raised eyebrow, Ali punched him on his arm._

_“Not a chance she is stealing it.”_

_\---_

I couldn’t believe it, what was in front of me, a photo of when I was trying to ask for a taxi the first day I arrived in Frankfurt, a photo of me driving with Christen on my motorcycle, another photo of the original graffiti on the bridge, then me jumping with Christen inside the pool, me arriving with Hope to the party.

But the next photo, made my cry. I am not going to lie and say I’ve never cried but I am not lying when I say I’ve never cried over a photo. It was an old one, it didn’t even looked taken with a professional camera, Ali was holding the handlebars of my motorcycle, looking at the camera with a big smile, next to her she was… Hope, my best friend and the one who helped me get thru prison. She was standing there, with a big smile as she was giving Ali a side hug.

“I teach her the standing on the motorcycle trick you know” A male voice told me when I started cleaning my tears.

“What?” I said and then turned around, there it was, Kyle, looking at me with a big smile.

“That’s when they graduated high school; my dad gave his motorcycle as a present to Hope and the blue Chevy was Ali’s half present the other half of the Chevy was mine.” he was still smiling at me when he finished and then he crashed me into a hug. “God, we missed you Ashlyn.” When we separated I looked at him, I knew he will figure out what was I trying to ask without actually asking him. “Ali is busy with some art guys; I am going to tell her to find you at the back exit, so you’ll have some privacy right?”

 “Thanks man, I missed you too.” I said with a smile as I exit the place, and then walked to the back of the building, just when I was arriving there, I got another idea; I went around the town trying to find everything I needed.

\---

_“So, Ashlyn uh?” Kyle asked the night after Ali and Ashlyn went to dinner, he saw them kissing goodbye and he was ready to make fun of her._

_“She is kind of perfect...I don’t know Kyle, shit happens” Ali said with a little blush on her face._

_“So Hope was right?” Kyle asked with a big smile on his face_

_“Maybe she was.”_

_\---_

“Kyle told me you were here.” I hear my favorite voice said, god, I missed it, I missed her, so much I am sure I wasn’t alive until I managed to turn around and look at her. My world stopped for a second, I swear.

“Alexandra…” It was all I manage to get out of my mouth, my mind was running miles per second and it didn’t seem to stop.  “Thanks for inviting me.”  I felt so stupid when I said that, out of the million things I wanted to say, that was the worst that came out of my mind, she chuckled and then she continued walking towards me.

“Hi, Ashlyn.” She said as she approached me and hugged me, I missed that, I melted in the embrace. When we separated she stared at me, we fall into a comfortable silence until I heard she was clearing her throat. “I read your letter.” She said, and then gave to me the piece of paper I wrote six months ago. “I think I was very clear when I told you about the burning part of writing the letter.” She said with a small smile.

“I don’t want what I feel for you to go away. It’s not fair, I demand a happy ending.” I confess, and she smiled. “I love you. I know I’m not perfect Alexandra, I know who and what I am. And I love you, people dream about finding love, they chase it, they found it and they lose it. Day after day, thinking about what is about to come, but we forgot the present and we lost the present. Love is when you can’t breathe, love is when it is absurd, love is when you miss, love is when you trust, love is when you give, and love is when it is crazy. And I love you.” I said looking at Ali.

“Ashlyn... I…” Ali tried to say something but I started talking again. I didn’t want to hear her yet. I was still fearing for rejection.

“I am crazy about you and I want to kiss you and I love the fact that I am crazy about you, I love this feeling I get when I’m with you, and feel like we can pass any obstacle, and I love when I feel this alive holding you in my arms. I have no doubts now, I am not regretting anything, I don’t have shadows anymore, not even a sin, not even a past. I just have my present. I just have my present and the truth is, today I want you.”

“What...?” Ali said, confused even surprised, maybe because that was the least romantic thing she wanted to hear. But I was going to make it clear.

 “I want you, I want you, but not just sexually, I want to kiss you, to hold you in my arms, to know everything about you, to see you every single day of my life, to listen to you about anything you want to say and I want to love you with all my soul, and I love the fact that I want you. I just want to start again, I want to be happy with you, I want to live today and today the only thing I know is that I want you. See? I even wrote it down.” I finished as I made her turn around, and there it was. An enormous graffiti painted in almost all the back part of the place, it was a beach, our beach, there was also a couple, riding a motorcycle with their helmets on, looking at the road, written in the sand it said: Today I want you.

“Are you for real?” Ali said with a smile on her face and I smiled at her, she turned around and kissed me hard, and like every time we kissed my mind shot down and I got lost the moment her lips touched mine. “I guess we have a lot to work on you know?” She said and then she kissed me again, and then again.

“I know… and I am looking forward to it.” I said with a smile on my face. “I love you warrior princess Alexandra Krieger.”

“I love you too car thief Ashlyn Harris.” She said with a little smile. “And today I want you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so until the next and last chapter, FYI, that last chapter was/is inspired by the song "Tu me llevas" by Zahara (The one that is at the end of the spanish movie "tengo ganas de ti") If you want to listen to it or whatever... Actually as extra information: when I watched the spanish film for the first time I did it because I heard some Zahara's songs where there and she is my favorite spanish singer/ songwriter and I love the fact that everytime she sings she really feels her songs... anyway if you want to listen to music in spanish I really recommend that song and her songs in general.


	12. And I have my happy ending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRYYYYY Life came in the way and shit happened, now I got the time to post it, sorry if it sucks.  
> Thanks for reading it.

**_4 years later_ **

I write something on my notebook and then look around me. I am nervous, that kind of nerves you feel about something you can’t wait to happen but you are also extremely nervous about it because it could change everything. I look at the paper in front of me before folding it and hiding it inside my wallet.

“So I am driving today?” Ali said as she took the keys from my hand, usually I am the one driving my motorcycle but sometimes I let her drive. I love the way she always get excited about it. “Today I am having lunch with Kyle, so probably he will drive me back.” She said as we sit.  

“No problem.” I said as I wrap my arms around her waist and rest my head on her shoulders. “Ali?” I asked, almost shy.

“What is wrong Ash?” She asks me, her voice sounds concerned and I smile, I love that about her.

“Have I ever told you how much I love you?” I asked, and she starts laughing; she turned around, and gave me a small kiss on my cheek before turning around and handling me my helmet.

“Just as many times I’ve told you how much I love you.” She said as she put her helmet on and started the motorcycle.

I sit in front of my desk and started working as fast as  I can, today I want to leave as early as I can, but at the same time I can’t concentrate enough. After I finished writing I look at what I wrote and now I feel like there is no one in this planet that could understand what the hell I am writing. So I went the only person in this planet that could possibly understand me and also the only one I can trust with this.

“Kelley what do you think about this.” I said as soon as I arrived to her desk and I handled the paper I was writing in. She looked at it for a couple of minutes, and then she looked at me with an enormous grin on her face.

“I get the idea of what are you going to do, but seriously, this is not your best work. I can’t understand shit.” She said as she handled me back the paper. “When are you going to do it?” She asked with a raised eyebrow.

“I don’t know; I am buying the ring today.” I said as I folded the paper again and put it inside my wallet.

After my short meeting with Kelley I drove to one of the jewelry stores I’ve been visiting a lot lately, when I entered I said hello to the lady on the front desk and stared at the engagement rings for about an hour or so before asking the old woman to show me one of them.

 “Do you think she will like it?” I asked the woman in front of me as I looked closely to it. I think it was a simple design, but enough to make a statement. I’ve been coming to this store for months trying to find an engagement ring that convince me.

“So, is she your happy ending?” the woman asked with a smile and I looked at her, just then I recognized her.

“You are the lady on that plane four years ago!” I said surprised and she just smiled at me.

“Yeah, all these weeks I was also trying to remember where I’ve met you before.” She confessed and then looked at the thing I was holding in my hand. “I bet the last thing she will be thinking about when you propose is that.” She said pointing to my hand.

“I know, but I want it to be perfect, I mean, there is a just few people who do this more than once.” I said laughing as I looked at it; I was nervous, really nervous. “And I am sure this is a one and done deal, so…” I looked at the old lady searching for advice; she was still smiling at me.

“I think she will love it.” She stated and I just smile wider.

“Ok I bet you are saying this so I buy it and stop bothering you, ok, I get it. I am taking it anyway.” I said as I passed my credit card to her and waited for the approval, there it goes, part of four years saving my money.

“So what’s her name?” She asked, curious, I don’t blame her.

“Alexandra Krieger” I said and I started laughing. “I bet she is the only one who can use that name and doesn’t make you laugh. What kind of name is that?” I asked, remembering the time I went to visit Hope’s grave for the first time.

“The name of your happy ending.” The lady said and I smiled as I took the small box when the transition was done.

I left the shop and drove to the gas station, my motorcycle was running out of gas. I arrived and parked next to a blue Chevy. I couldn’t help myself and smiled the moment I saw the person that was coming out of the passenger sit of the car and waved goodbye to the driver. But I continued on my way inside the store.

“You are the owner of the motorcycle right?” The guy in the cashier asked me when I was about to pay for the gas, I nodded my head and he just continued. “I think they are trying to steal it.” He said and I just smiled.

“No, it’s just my future fiancée trying to be funny.” I said when I looked out the store and saw Ali sitting on my motorcycle with a big smile on her face. I walked over there and hugged her. “How long have you been following me?” I asked with a small smile.

“Not that much, Kyle saw you coming here when we finished filling the car’s tank. So we just waited for you.” She said with a small smile and then gave me a quick kiss on my lips.  “Oh, and by the way… yes.”

“What…?” I asked, truly confused. I had no idea what was she talking about and why she sounded so serious about it.  

“Ashlyn… you really need to find a better place if you want to hide your stuff. Under MY helmet is the worst place to hide it.” She said holding the small box containing the ring I just bought, and then I saw them, small traces of tears on her cheeks. “So… my answer is yes I want to be your wife.” She said again with a big smile and tears running down her eyes.

“Where are you from kid?” I asked with a big smile, fighting the tears that were threatening to come out. “You just ruined your surprise.” I said with a small laugh.

“I think I just made it better, fiancée.” She said as she pulled me down to kiss me. “I love you, car thief Ashlyn Harris.”

“I love you too, but I am not sure if you are still going to be a warrior princess Alexandra soon- to- be Harris.” I said before kissed her again.

“Well you can just call me princess then.” She smiled at me and gave me a quick peck on my lips before she moved to the drivers sit on the motorcycle.  

“Hey, what if you go all road rage and kill some pedestrians.” I said as I sit back and put my hands around her waist.  

“I hate girls like you.” She said with a small smile but just before I continued with my line she interrupted me. “But today I want you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END


End file.
